And then the refreshments come...

Weekly Weigh in and why I don't blog like I used to...

2012-01-06T06:55:00.000-08:00

My daughter's cooing voice behind me is quickly turning to a whine, which means she is about to break into a yowl. The yowl will progress into tears, which will result in full fledged crying until she gets fed.

So I guess I need to stop browsing articles on other blogs and own up to my own Friday Weigh in.

Last Friday, right before we started another glorious year, I weighed in at a whopping 280lbs. Yes, I have gained weight back.

(Which must be really shocking because as I typed it my whining daughter suddenly pulled a laundry basket full of wrapping paper down on her head).
She's all right. Let's move on...

That was last week. That was 2011. This is 2012, and I want to lose at least 2 pounds a week.

("she typed as her baby nibbled on a piece of tinsel she pulled off the floor").
She still all right. Let's move on...

In May my family is taking a trip out west. Arizona, California, Oregon, Utah, and Colorado! We've never done anything like this before, and I am so excited!

(aaaaand grabbing a plastic bag away from my 9 month old...)
She's okay.

Between now and May I want to lose at least 2 pounds a week. There are clothes I want to wear on my vacation, and I don't fit into them yet!

(the yowling has begun...)

This past week I've been cutting things, adding workouts, and all the lovely jazz that goes along with making major life changes. It hasn't been easy, and I have messed up a LOT. But today, I am happy to report, I lost my 2 pounds. A little surprised, but always happy to see a loss.

(enter the tears and crying...Harmy's, not mine)

Now that you're all wondering just how messy my house really is, and as my daughter tries to climb up my leg and eat my computer, I hope you will not hold it against me that I don't blog as often as I used to. I started this blog when I had 1 daughter who wasn't crawling yet. Now I have a 3 year old and a 9 month old. Life is crazy, but part of the weight loss process is changing things about my life that I don't like and finding ways to comfort myself and enjoy life other than food. That means enjoying the craziness while it lasts and not wishing for a simpler time that will come all too soon.

I hope you have a lovely Friday. I am going to try and blog my updated goals today, but right now my daughter is in the kitchen pulling things out of the dishwasher, so I must run.....

What's my lunch!

2012-01-04T12:23:00.000-08:00

Ohhh, promises, promises. They are so easy to make, but then we have to stick to them! When I promised to do this I didn't think about the holidays. However, I took pictures for a few days and then Christmas happened, and then new years, and then.....well....here we are.

But it really did help! Knowing that you all were going to see all my nasty lunch secrets made me think more about what I was eating. So I'm going to pick it up again and try to keep it going. The last lunch I posted was from 12/20. Here are the days following:

December, 21 2011: Meme, Harmy, and Mommy picked up lunch and took it to Daddy at work. This is a special treat for everyone. It's good for us to connect on a work day every now and then :-P This time, we went to Wendy's! I love Wendy's because they have stuff I can eat without feeling like a slug.

I got a side salad and a small Chili.

December, 22 2011: Mmmmmm, protein! This is 2 eggs cooked in light olive oil with mushrooms and onions, and skim Mozzarella on a piece of Oatmeal bread. I added a half a banana to make it look healthier.

December, 23 2011: This turned out really yummy. It's a throwback to my college days. They say most people gain 15 pounds their freshman year. I actually lost weight my first years of college. I ate very well because I skipped the hot food lines and went straight to the salad and sandwich bars! I lived off veggie wraps. This one is stuffed with, get ready now....brown rice, pinto beans, lettuce, carrots, and AVOCADO! It was really really good and guilt free!

SHHHHHHHH! If you think of anything bad about this wrap don't tell me. Ignorance is bliss...

And then came Christmas....but I'll make another post about our Christmas. I'm afraid I wasn't very well behaved.

What's my lunch!

2011-12-20T13:29:00.000-08:00

As promised! Here it is, today's lovely lunch. But first I have to tell you the story....

I planned to have a cucumber soup that I made and froze last summer when our garden was spitting out cucumbers with rapid abandon! But I discovered something...

Cucumber soup is gross!

GROSS I tell you!

This is me after 1 bite:

Soup is meant to be hot, and cucumbers are meant to be cold. That's the plain simple truth. So the soup went the way of my husband's leftover Ramen Noodle broth, and I decided to have a salad instead.

Mmmm, lovely veggies!

For dressing, I use 1 teaspoon of Olive oil and then sprinkle on some herbs and spices. I've been doing that for a while now, and I really enjoy it.

Salad tip: add extra nutrition to a salad by sprinkling on herbs and spices! Or better yet, throw in some fresh herbs! Add a small amount of olive oil, and you have a salad that doesn't need to be "dressed" up.

And the finished product:

The bread is Nature's Own Sandwich rolls with a little REAL Mozzarella. They made a terrific salad companion without going overboard.

The funny thing was, this is way less than I have been eating, but I was so full afterward! I didn't want to eat anything else. It satisfied me, which I totally did not expect. I thought I'd be fighting cravings all afternoon but I didn't get hungry again till well after 3pm.

My daily Lunch

2011-12-20T08:07:00.000-08:00

Lunch time is a huge struggle for me. I don't eat much breakfast, and it's easy not to snack in the morning because we're so busy. But lunch is a toughy. Usually I'm in a rush and trying to get it ready quickly so I opt for unhealthy quick choices like noodles and mac-n-cheese rather than a salad or a healthy wrap.

But that is going to change. This spring I have a huge trip coming up. My husband and I are packing up the girls and heading west! The grand canyon, Yellowstone, Oregon and everything in between! Yes, we are driving, and I want to look better than I have since we were married. I know weight loss is not about looking good but being healthy, but I'll be honest. I've never liked family vacations because of all the pictures. I want to get over that this trip, and be ready to wear all my "thin" clothes. (I've been stockpiling since I started losing weight).

In an effort to eat healthier lunches, I'm going to start taking pictures of what I ate for lunch and post it. The good, the bad...and even the really bad.

I would love to have anyone join me in this, but it's a personal challenge, so don't feel obligated. But if you are also struggling, you may want to give it a try.

Late night snacking

2011-12-18T22:18:00.000-08:00

Tonight I've been thinking a lot about why I want to eat all the time. I'm sitting here working on Christmas cards. Not hungry, not bored, but I feel like snacking.

WHY WHY WHY!???

I've got a 32 ounce water bottle sitting in front of me that is now down to 4 ounces and still I want to get a snack.

WHY? WHY?WHY????

I don't need to eat, so I'm resisting the urge to run out to the kitchen and grab some cheese and crackers, but I really just wish I didn't WANT to run out to the kitchen and grab anything but a cup of tea or a bottle of water. I've already had some almonds. I don't need anything else, but I WANT it.

Why? Isn't there supposed to be an internal shut off valve that tells us when we don't need to eat anymore? Shouldn't my body tell me when I don't need to eat anymore?

A new House!

2011-11-02T13:32:00.000-07:00

Here we are in November, and I have so much to write, and very little time to write it. At the beginning of September my husband and I became first time homeowners! Here are a couple pics:

Hallway: all that ugly carpet has been changed.

Sun Porch! Beautiful room, though the carpet has been changed since then.

MY KITCHEN! Complete with dish washer, stove, and a TON of cabinets! All we had to get was the refrigerator!

More cabinets in the kitchen! I love storage space!

I'll try to get more update pictures once I have things more decorated. Now we are all unpacked and settled, but I haven't hung anything on the wall and a lot of the windows are still curtain-less.

Buying a house was a new experience for me. Exciting, but scary. And I am ashamed to say throughout the process of packing, moving, and unpacking I gained a lot of weight. 19 pounds to be exact.

That's right. Because of my lack of focus I am back up to 279. I could kick myself if I was limber enough. I feel weak and drained. No energy at all.

But it doesn't do any good dwelling on the mistakes we've recently made. I need to get on down the road and start again. Thankfully, I smacked myself awake before re-gaining everything, but I really hate having to re-learn habits. I have hooked up with a friend who has been more successful than I have and we are going to weigh in each week together. That will give me some accountability. I have also joined "Lose-it!" and am tracking my calories and weight loss there.

Please add me on Spark people and Lose it and kick my backside if I don't keep up with this stuff.

My tentative plan: (haven't sat down and written out specific goals yet)

Eat healthier items and less of them.
Start Couch to 5K again if I can find a treadmill someone will let me use 3 times a week.
Weigh in with a friend each week
Blog at least once a day

As if late...

2011-07-16T05:20:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry I haven't posted sooner. Things have been happening! But not much weight loss. Our computer was down for about a week, and when we got it back we were so busy, I haven't had much time to sit down at the computer and write. Seriously, we've been that busy!

The house thing is moving forward, and it's possible that in a month Jon and I may be homeowners! It's all very exciting, but very time consuming and stressful. I had no idea there was so much paper work! This week we've been in meetings, comparing insurance companies, trying to get proof of every little bit of money that's come in over the past few months, and getting a lawyer!

Yup, lawyers, lenders, Realtors....it's enough to drive you bonkers! But it's also very exciting.

The difficulty this creates for me is in my eating habits. I am a notorious emotional eater and this kinda stress makes me want to snack all the time! I'm keeping grapes, dark chocolate, and milk on hand, but it's been hard. I keep reaching for chips and don't always put them down before it's too late. The result, not enough water, too much salt, swelling and no weight loss. 2 weeks ago I dropped down to 259, but I haven't moved past that.

As for the Detox, it got a little too expensive buying special foods, so I haven't been able to do it for a week or so. I'm still trying to stay away cheese, peanuts, wheat, butter, certain oils, etc. But I'm not restricting ANY fruits and veggies. Those are important.

I'm going to try and write everyday to remind myself not to snack or overeat at meals. Feel free to hound me to death about it :-P

Now I have to get moving. Mercy will be up soon and I just heard Jon's alarm clock go off. Hope you all have a wonderful day!

Marie

So much for workout free Friday

2011-06-24T07:13:00.000-07:00

Last weekend was wonderful. We saw a wonderful play. We went to see "39 Steps" at the Barter Theater in Virginia. It was Awesome! Here's the Youtube ad.

If you are in the area, I highly recommend it!

We got some much needed wonderful rest at a lovely cabin in the mountains and had a wonderful time driving around the mountains.

And of course, we ate a LOT of wonderful food! Hubby took me to an Italian restaurant on Friday night. I snacked on cookies, chips, and dark chocolate all weekend. I had coffee every day! And we ate at Logan's Roadhouse on the way home.

Therefore, my weigh in this week was not so wonderful. I didn't lose any weight, due to my wonderful getaway weekend. So this week I've been trying to get back on track.I probably should have started my 21 days of detox after the anniversary, so I'm restarting it as of yesterday. Today is day 2.

Detox Day 2:
Breakfast: Blueberry and cucumber shake
Lunch: Not sure yet. It has to be items from the elimination diet, and I don't know what that will be yet.
Dinner: Squash soup

Previous weight: 260
Current weight: 260

Weight lost: -0

Couch to 5K

A whole bunch of people have been going on about Couch to 5K. It is a great program, but let's get one thing straight. THIS CONCEPT IS NOT NEW!! This principle has been around for ages, and casual runners have been using it for a long time. C25K is just a catchy name on an old concept trainers have been using for years. They didn't invent it, and it's not the first place I've heard it.

I personally have to give the credit for hearing about this type of running plan from one of my Resident Assistants when I attended Word of Life Bible Institute in 2001. She ran all the time, and I wanted to start. So I went to her for advice. She told me that when she was in high school she struggled with her weight, and decided to start running to help control it.

When she first started she couldn't run very well, so her mother told her alternate running and walking and gradually increase the amount of running time while decreasing the amount of walking time. Same concept as C25K.

This morning I started. I'll be walking 3 days a week. Today marked the beginning of week 1.

A good break

2011-06-20T16:11:00.000-07:00

As I posted last week, my husband and I went away for the weekend to celebrate our anniversary! 8 fantastic years! He told me he had a surprise, but I wouldn't let him tell me what it was. I love good surprises, but he has a bad habit of letting the cat out of the bag beforehand. Turns out this was a really good surprise!

The first movie we ever watched together was at my 22nd birthday. It was Alfred Hitchcock's "39 Steps." I love Alfred Hitchcock! I also love the theater.

Well this weekend, my husband took me to see "the 39 steps" performed on stage! It was HILARIOUS! WE both laughed, and I laughed so hard I got teary eyed a few times! The cool thing was that the whole play was performed by only 4 actors! They did an amazing job, and we had a great time.

Then we went up to the cabin and spent 2 restful nights away from kids and work. We didn't even get cell reception up there, so there were no distractions!

But, as I said, I did not diet. I didn't think about calorie counting or liquid meals. We went out to eat twice (Italian the first night and Logan's Roadhouse on the way home Sunday). Today I've been trying to get back on track, but we're still eating up the sandwich fixin's, so I haven't gone back to liquid yet.

Tomorrow I plan to pick up on my detox diet and complete the last 2 weeks of it without a break. We have been given a lot of squash and cucumber, so if anyone knows some good soup or smoothie recipes that use summer squash, zucchini, or cucumber PLEASE let me know!

My fantastic weekend is over, and my daughter decided to welcome me home by getting sick last night. She woke up close to midnight vomiting like crazy and running a temperature of 101.5. This went on for about an hour.

The temperature started to go down after some Tylenol, but the vomiting didn't stop till her little tummy was empty. She fell asleep next to me on the couch while we were watching Barney at 1:30am, so I just left her and slept next to her. She woke up a few more times throughout the night, but we haven't had any more puking episodes. Hopefully it was just something she ate, and we're passed it.

It's about time to get her ready for bed, so I'll sign off. Hope everyone had a great weekend!

Friday Weigh in: June 17th

2011-06-17T07:37:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was bad. Not all day, but I've been getting ready for this vacation and just got really busy and distracted. Breakfast and lunch were normal, but I ate a candy bar at the laundry mat and that kind of threw things helter skelter.

Then yesterday evening we met with a realtor to make an offer on a house! That's right, we've started the process of buying a house and boy am I confused! There are so many details and fine print! After the meeting we just picked up a piza on the way home. It was late when we finished there, and after we got the girls from the babysitters and drove home I didn't feel like doing anything. So I just ate pizza with everyone else. And of course to top off my cheat I threw some chips in with it and I think it messed up my weigh in. I waited a full 12 hours after my last meal, just to be sure everything was out of my system. Still, I think I retained some water from all the sodium I took in.

So today I was scared getting on the scale. I hate that feeling. The feeling of expecting disappointment. I like to get on that scale expecting victory, knowing that whatever I see I did my best. But today I expected to be disappointed.

In addition to dissapointment in myself, I'm really bloated and my tummy is gurgling. It's amazing how we get used to feeling that way when we eat like that every day. It takes a few weeks of going without it to make us realize how truly uncomfortable we are most of the time!

So, I stepped on the scale expecting disappointment. But despite my pizza/chip indulgence I lost 2 pounds. However, I did not make it out of the 260's yet, which is what I really wanted this week. The sad thing is, if I had stayed diligent last night, I probably would have.

This weekend: Anniversary trip! Woohoo! My husband and I are going away for the weekend. To a cabin in the mountains! I'm so excited, but I have to tell you I will not be worrying about liquid meals. We're taking our own food so I won't be tempted to overindulge in restaurant food, but I'm not doing the liquid detox while we're away.

When I get back: Jon has something up his sleeve. I don't know what, but he's been hinting at something big. If I can, I'll share the details when I get back! *wink.

Previous weight: 262
Current weight: 260
Weight lost this week: -2

Total weight lost: 45

Updating My Goals

2011-06-12T21:16:00.000-07:00

Hopefully within the next month I will hit the first big weight loss milestone. 50 pounds lost! I only have 7 pounds to go until I get there, and I think I can achieve that by the end of this Detox phase.

So, I thought it was a good time to take inventory and update my goals. It's important to have lights shining at you from the end of the tunnel, and out at us along the way!

Here is a list of my official NEW weight loss goals! (psssst--some of them are carried over from the old list)

Long Term:

Health

Lower risk of diabetes, heart disease, cancer, etc
Decrease knee pain.
Increase energy levels
Lose 155 pounds
Add more fruits and veggies to my regular diet.
Work unhealthy foods out of my regular diet

Activity and Life

Start running again
Be able to Bike and Hike with my family
Be able to race and keep up with my daughters as they grow
My hubby to be able to carry me :-)
Set a good example of healthy eating habits and activity for my children and others

Clothes

Wear at least one piece of single digit clothing!
Shop at Thrift stores
Get below a size 12

Spiritual and Mental

Build the habit of having a consistent quiet time; Bible study and prayer everyday
Live a more disciplined, orderly lifestyle that shows I practice what I believe
Start writing poetry again
Start writing down memories and stories from my daughters lives

Short Term:

These won't take as long and provide smaller victories along the way! Of course, these will change more often.

Health

Reduce swelling in my legs, hands, and ankles
Complete a full 21 days of Digestive Detox
Get down into the 240's

Activity

Start regular workouts
Start and maintain a garden during the summer months

Clothes

Drop a dress size (get down to size 20/22)
Wear the cute brown skirt and the green top hanging in my window!

Spiritual and Mental

Go 2 weeks without missing a day of Bible study and Prayer
Make time to Blog every day
Set aside time to write/journal

What about you?! What are your goals? Post a link to where you have publicly declared what you are trying to do so we can all check it out and cheer you on!

Friday Weigh in!

2011-06-10T09:06:00.000-07:00

Weekly Weigh In

Drum roll please......da da da DAAAA! I lost weight this week! Woohoo!

2 pounds to be exact! So excited! Only 3 more pounds and we're out of the 260's! I'm hoping that milestone comes next week when I begin my 21 days of liquid meals :-P As long as I can keep the grazing and emotional eating under control.

Today's New Discover

Okay, I admit it. I have never tried split pea soup. It's green. And honestly when I was younger it never sounded appealing. But since I grew up and realized that I loved peas, I've been wanting to try it. Now is a good time to try!

Today for lunch I am making an easy and simple split pea soup. I got the recipe from here, but I'm cutting it in half and adding some more spices and herbs. I like a lot of flavor! I will let you all know how it turns out!

That's all for now. I'm in the middle of getting lunch.

Previous weight: 264

Current weight: 262

Weight loss this week: -2

Total weight Loss: 42

A quick word...

2011-06-09T22:10:00.000-07:00

Just a little heads up, I posted an updated picture on the pics and progress page! It was taken on Mother's day this year! Check it out!

Marie

Wonder Salad and Coffee Pangs

2011-06-09T21:10:00.000-07:00

Learning to Love Naked Salads!

As I've said before, this detox is forcing me to think up healthier meal alternatives. My favorite salad dressing has always been Ranch. It took a lot for me to give it up, but it's been a while since I used it. Still, I have a hard time thinking of a salad without salad dressing. It just seems wrong. It looks.....naked! *gasp!

But I have been learning to enjoy salad, even without dressing! Some ways I deal with no dressing are to add beans and/or meat that have a lot of flavor, throw in some nuts, avocado, and onions! For today's lunch I had an amazing Spinach salad that tasted AWESOME!

I ripped up a few cups of spinach and chopped in some green peppers. I heated some leftover white meat chicken and some kidney beans in a little olive oil, thyme, garlic powder, and sea salt and tossed it all together with the veggies.

It turned out soooooo good! I was really impressed. I was going to add some walnuts, but it didn't need them. I wish I could say I was that disciplined for the whole day, but...

Didn't make it...

...but I drank it! One of the things we're not supposed to drink on this detox is coffee. I LOVE coffee. I've been drinking it since I was 14, and I love it. I knew it would be hard going a month without having it, and it sure is. Tonight I was feeling tired and stressed out. Normally, I'd curl up on the couch with a cup of coffee and relax.

I ended up going for a drive after supper while hubby watched the kids. Where did I go? McDonalds. I didn't want fries, burgers, or any food. All I could think about was coffee! I got a medium and drank about 1/3 of it before guilt kicked in and I dumped the rest out.

I've known for a while that I was an emotional eater. I'm always tempted to turn to food/drinks when I get overtired or overwhelmed. One of the good things I wish to accomplish through this detox period is to turn my frustration in a more positive direction. Get up early enough to read my Bible every day, spend more time in prayer as I seek the Lord's help to overcome food addictions, read some books I've been wanting to read for a while, and possibly even write a few things.

What food cravings do you struggle with? How do you overcome emotional eating?

Detoxing: First official week

2011-06-07T21:43:00.000-07:00

The Clean Week 2: True Elimination Week

Last week I eliminated a lot of naughty foods from my diet and worked on some bad eating habits. This week I started the Elimination Phase of the Clean Detox eating plan.

You eat 3 well balanced meals made of only foods from the elimination food list that can be found here. A lot of these foods are unfamiliar to me, so at the beginning of the week I made a master meal plan so I wouldn't be caught wondering what to eat.

This turned out to be really helpful. Trying to come up with well balanced meals on the fly can be really difficult, especially if you are not familiar with the foods you're working with. If you're like me, and you find yourself facing a lot of new ingredients, make sure you plan ahead for the week.

Challenges

I've had to get creative, because the list is so restrictive. No dairy, no wheat, no oats, no soy, no sugar, not even Splenda! There are a lot of fruits and veggies that you can eat, but even those categories are full of restrictions. But it's been interesting to learn some new ideas for healthy meals that I would never have thought of before if I hadn't been forced to think outside my box.

Breakfast Time!
Usually for breakfast I eat some combination of toast, cottage cheese, eggs, cheese, peanut butter, cereal, or fruit. But with this new eating plan pretty much EVERYTHING I eat for breakfast was eliminated!

So I did some research and went to the Whole Foods Store. There I found a hot breakfast cereal from Bob's Red Mill. It's made of ground Buckwheat, (which is allowed on the elimination diet) and it turned out to be pretty good. The consistency is much like oatmeal and just as bland. It tastes like whatever you put in it.

This is a small bag, and I was concerned it wouldn't last long. But one cup of the Buckwheat made a ton of cereal! Enough to last 2-3 days at least. Probably longer if I add a lot of other stuff to the cereal!

This morning I added apples, cinnamon, walnuts, and some Stevia. It was creamy enough that I didn't need to add any milk, so I drank a glass of Almond milk on the side.

It was surprisingly satisfying! It's no Frosted Lucky Charms, but it'll do! I have some other ideas like adding berries or pears to it and will probably keep eating it even after the Detox is over.

Supplements
This eating plan can be restrictive. I've been wanting to look into adding vitamins and dietary supplements for a while, and I thought this was a good time to do it. This week I added spirulina, one of the listed "Superfoods" and a multivitamin. And of course, lots and lots of WATER!

Detoxing: Getting ready

2011-06-06T14:10:00.000-07:00

The Clean Week 1: Getting ready to Eliminate!

This was actually Friday's post, but the weekends are so crazy lately I didn't get time to finish it till today!

I love this picture of my daughter, MeMe. The look on her face perfectly expresses how I've been feeling since giving birth to Harmy almost two months ago!

Lately I've been trying to get control of the bad food habits I picked up while pregnant. But cravings, binge eating, yadda, yadda, yadda....You know what I'm talking about!

Last week my depression hit an all time low when I weighed in and saw that I had GAINED 4 pounds over my pre-pregnancy weight!Then I picked up a magazine at the grocery store and read about a 21 day Detox Program called "The Clean Detox " developed by Dr. Alejandro Junger.

Now, I do NOT advocate fad diets or quick temporary weight loss solutions.

But this is something different. It's not meant to be a permanent weight loss program, or even a permanent eating solution, (although you can follow the list of elimination foods up to 180 days, and you will probably lose weight while you do it).

The Clean Detox is a 21 day body cleansing program that flushes out your system with super healthy liquid meals like smoothies and soups, while also flooding your body with rebuilding nutrients.

Food Rehab!

Before beginning the 21 day cleanse, you start off with a 3-5 day elimination phase to remove foods that cause common food allergies, sensitivities, and digestive problems. Last week (May 29th-June5th) was the start of my elimination phase.

The "Rebuilding" manual (linked below) says that "jumping into the Clean Program too quickly can cause you to have stronger detox symptoms which include headaches, bloating, constipation, or diarrhea." Because I have a whole lot of stuff to eliminate, (it's sad.....really sad...), I opted to take an extra week to workout some of these issues.

So last week I focused on removing many non-elimination foods from my everyday diet...

goodbye for now old friends

Coffee *sniff, Dairy, Fast food, Sugar/Splenda, Wheat/Oats, Potatoes, White Rice, Sugar, Butter/Vegetable Oil, Some fruits: bananas, grapes, oranges, grapefruits

and replacing them with things that are on the elimination list!

Herbal teas, Almond Milk, Stevia, LOTS AND LOTS of water, Lots of veggies and fruit, Kidney beans, Black beans, Turkey burger, Nuts: almonds, walnuts, pecans, Brown rice, and chicken!

First Week Results?

I feel GREAT!
I am more energetic than I have been in a long time, and my attitude is better. Part of it may be mental, but I am finding more pleasure in the little things like playing with my daughter, walking the dogs, and laughing with my husband.

But what is the best perk? I lost 5 pounds! Yea, you read right! 5 big ugly pounds, in 1 week! I haven't lost that much since the first week I started this journey back in January 2010! This has me really excited to continue and see where this whole thing will take me.

Previous weight: 269

Current weight: 264

Total weight Lost: 41 pounds

FEEDBACK: Has anyone else tried this eating plan? Do you have any suggestions for someone just starting out? Any foods to avoid? How did it work for you?!

Tomorrow's post: What's going on this week and more information on Clean Detox!

Click on the image below or visit the Clean Program website to read more about this program.

A "new" arrival!

2011-05-23T07:12:00.000-07:00

News: Everyone say a big hello to.....

Harmy!!!! (Harmony: Mercy has already nicknamed her :-P)

About a month ago we welcomed our second beautiful blue-eyed baby girl! None of our family was able to be there, so two wonderful ladies from our church were with us during the delivery. They were fantastic! I highly recommend having a former pediatric nurse with you when you give birth. It's nice to have someone who knows EXACTLY what is going on and will tell you! hehehe.

Daddy was great!

He is such a rock and stayed calm and cool during the whole thing.

My first moments with my girl!

"I'm a big sister!"

Be sure to check out our family blog for updates!

Weight loss: a huge disappointment.

When I was pregnant with my first daughter I gained 20 pounds. Almost immediately after she was was born I dropped 30 pounds; that brought me 10 pounds below my pre-preggo weight! I was elated and fully expecting the same thing this time around. But this time I only gained 15 pounds, so I thought I would drop at least 10, maybe 15 pounds below my pre-preggo weight!

Well, I was not so lucky this time. This time I dropped 6 pounds before coming home from the hospital. That's not even the weight of the baby! I couldn't believe it. How could I give birth to an almost 8 pound baby and only lose 6 pounds? But over the course of the week some swelling went down, fluids came off and I dropped the rest of the 15 pounds. That brought me to my pre-preggo weight...

And that's where it stayed. That's where it's STILL staying. Needless to say, I am incredibly disappointed and anxious to get back to losing weight. I'm feeling well, but sooooooooooooooooooooooo tired. My 6 week appointment is this Thursday, and I'm hoping to get the go ahead to start working out again. Until then, I'm walking and working in the garden for exercise.

Has anyone else been disappointed after the baby was born and didn't lose as much as they thought they would?

Tomorrow: my healthy eating plan and my re-evaluated goals.

Well, here we are!

2011-04-05T05:37:00.000-07:00

By brain is fuzzy and scrambled this week. I'm forgetting things more and more, and I'm in full 'nesting' mode. Therefore, this post is probably going to be a bit scattered and disorganized. I just can't seem to settle my head down to anything other than baby stuff right now. I've tried to help out a bit labeling.

6 days

It's the last week of pregnancy! Baby Harmy is due this coming Monday, and if she doesn't show up by Thursday, we'll start talking induction at my weekly doctor's appointment! Yea, yea, I know, it's best to let baby come when baby is ready. But my first was a week overdue before we induced, and I REALLY don't want to wait that long. Don't worry. I'll be reasonable :-P

The skinny

I haven't been keeping up with my weight gain progress either. I've gained about 10-15 pounds total throughout the pregnancy. That's well within what the doctor told me was okay, but I'm still disappointed. I wanted to be down to my pre-preggo weight before I delivered, but working out has been VERY hard this last month. Contractions have been on and off and I've been sick with a virus all this past week.

Cravings:

Eating has been really difficult. I wake up in the middle of the night craving roast beef sandwiches and Arby's Angus beef and cheddar! The thing is, I REALLY DON"T CARE FOR BEEF! I tried eating broccoli instead because it has a lot of iron, but it just didn't satisfy that yearning for a big meaty sandwich! I stopped buying mayo because I was going through like crazy. Between meat and cheese cravings and sweet cravings (cookies have been haunting me), it's been really hard to refrain from in between meal eating. I have to admit, I haven't been successful all the time.

Inspiration:

But this morning I read some really inspirational posts on various blogs. This one was especially helpful from REAL FAT. I'm about to lose 20-30 pounds here really quickly, and with the baby out and breastfeeding coming on, this is the perfect time to remind myself NOT TO QUIT!

I'll post pictures!

Please keep us in mind and prayers this week as we get ready to welcome a new life into our family and the world.

OATMEAL!

2011-03-29T06:18:00.000-07:00

For some weird reason, spring decided to extend her vacation and asked winter to take over for a few more days. As a result we are back to long pants, long sleeves, coats, and the smell of burning wood wafting through the house. Not what you'd expect in a southern springtime.

On the down side, the weird weather has given me a sore throat that just won't go away. I'm hoping it's not strep, but whatever it is will juts have to run it's coarse. I hope it's gone before baby comes.

On the up side, OATMEAL! My sister in law just gave us a bunch of food from her kitchen and in it was a whole box of flavored oatmeal packets. They are GREAT on a cold morning and my daughter also loves them. I was surprised to find out they are only 100 calories a piece (milk not included). They have really been a blessing on my sore throat these past cold mornings.

Is anyone else having weather issues? What is your favorite cold morning breakfast?!

A new blog!

2011-03-25T10:40:00.000-07:00

Isn't it amazing how long it can take us to get things done, even when we really want to do them! For the past two years I've been wanting to start a family blog. I've started and restarted a few times, but never seemed to be able to get passed layout and appearance! It just never looked how I wanted it to look!

Well finally, now that my first child is 2 years old, I've got it set up to where I like it! I'm sure it will change, I'm always tweaking, but at least the basic layout is settled! Now I'm working on adding the information :-P

So if you've ever wondered about our family, or just want to see some really really cute pictures, check it out!

Not Our Own: I Corinthians 19:20

Nothing to do with weight loss

2011-02-25T06:37:00.000-08:00

Well, we are almost at 8 months, and I am feeling it! Sleep is so rare. I usually have to take a nap in the afternoon because I'm sooooooo tired, I won't make it to bed time. Last night I went to bed at 10, dead tired. Only to wake up incredibly sore at 2am. I couldn't fall asleep again until 5am! UGH! Meme (Daughter #1) was up before 8am and now I am tuckered out and for some reason my ears keep popping.

So right now I'm dragging. I totally forgot to weigh in this morning before I ate breakfast. I'll try to remember on Sunday. Meme is in a wedding this weekend (flower girl), but it's about 2 hours away. I'm excited, but it's going to mean a rehearsal and late night for her, then an early morning for me. We decided to just stay up there overnight, rather than drive back tonight and then back up tomorrow morning.

I'm excited to get her all dressed up, but I hope the hotel has a comfortable bed! Now I'm off to pack.

Happy weight loss everyone!

A little iron never hurt anyone?

2011-02-18T07:00:00.000-08:00

But it sure does make you constipated! Apparently my hemoglobin levels are low, and my doctor is concerned they will drop lower as we get closer to delivery. So, it's back on the daily iron doses. With Mini-bit I didn't have to take iron until AFTER delivery, and it was torture! This time I was prepared. I picked up some Philips laxatives along with the prescription.They aren't working very well though. And it's getting uncomfortable.

Other than that and sleep deprivation, aching muscles, and a medicine ball sitting on my bladder, things are going well! I was about the same weight at the Doctor's office this week as I was 2 weeks ago, so they are happy.

Today's weigh-in was pretty much in the vein that they have been the past couple weeks. I did lose 1 pound, but that still doesn't bring me down to where I was a few weeks ago.

I also learned that baby #2 is gaining about 1/2 a pound a week from here on out! That certainly complicates things, because a 2 pound weigh loss then becomes 1 1/2 pounds. I'm trying to compensate, but I keep having to tell myself that I won't get an accurate weight reading until after the baby is born, so no reason to get discouraged.

But I still want to be down to my pre-preggo weight before she's born. We'll keep plugging away!

The appliances know....

2011-02-12T14:22:00.000-08:00

Have you ever noticed that in times of greatest financial distress, everything seems to break down? 2 weeks ago our nice Dyson vacuum cleaner stopped working. The motor DIED, just like that. Of course, it only died AFTER we replaced the filter! I was able to get all the floors vacuumed the other day with an older vacuum cleaner, but it's not that great a one and we're still getting covered with dog hair anytime our clothes come in contact with the floor.

Last week it was the washing machine. Again, spin cycle doohickey-thingy (that's a highly technical term) just DIED! Thank goodness for wonderful friends that let you come over and do laundry at their place!

All this about 1 month after my husband lost his job. The good news is he should be starting a new job soon, we're just not sure when. Until then we are living off our tax return.

It's like the appliances know when you can't afford to replace them! There has to be some sort of conspiracy here.

Blah! I hate scales

2011-02-11T06:29:00.000-08:00

This mornings weigh in was a HUGE disappointment, and more than a little frustrating. It was a good week. Good portion control. I got four 30-45 minute workouts in....I even threw out mayo from my diet and started eating my tuna plain!

But even so, according to my scale I am up anywhere from 2-3 pounds this week!

My only consolation? I weighed myself 6 times and got a different reading every time. So we may need to change the battery again.

Still, it's frustrating when you watch what you eat and workout, and the weight still sticks to you like a lost baby chick! UGGGHHHH!

I have a doctor's appointment on Tuesday, so I must now be extra careful and make sure to get in at least 2 good workouts between now and then. I've already walked this morning, and I can get in 45 minutes on the bike on Sunday, and a walk on Monday. Hopefully that should work off any excess swelling and water weight. Things have been really sore lately, though. The stationary bike is getting harder to manage with my big tummy, and sore hip joints. I have been considering switching to a brisk 45 minutes walk every morning instead of alternating between walking and the bike.

Have you ever experienced something like this? When you think you've done everything well, and it just doesn't happen? I know it does go that way some times, we've all seen it on the biggest loser. But when it happens to you, it just stinks! What motivates you to get back into weight loss after a week like this?

Curves

2011-02-08T06:36:00.000-08:00

I know I haven't been posting mid-week very much since I got pregnant. The computer and I are not close friends and it's uncomfortable to sit for long periods of time.

But today I have a lot on my mind, and want to take a bit to talk about CURVES.

No, not THOSE kinds of curves! Not the program Curves either. I'm talking about LIFE curves. Those tricky little bends in the road that catch us unexpectedly and leave us wondering, "Okay Lord, what now?"

Since Hubby lost his job, it seems like we've been thrown onto this incredibly twisty, winding road. Around every corner is a new challenge, a new problem, or a new opportunity that requires so much of us! We find ourselves at a loss, not knowing what to say or how to react.

By nature I am a runner. (I don't like living in one place for long, I like traveling and moving. I like changes of scenery and people.) And I won't hide that this new road has me feeling the old familiar itch to move on. Run away, and find something new somewhere else.

That is how I feel, but I know (curse my brain), that it is not what I should do. In all of this I know there is a path through which I can honor and glorify the Lord. An opportunity to serve HIM, not just in the new responsibilities we've been given, but in our reaction to adversity and confusion.

He must remain our solid rock, while the ground and people around us shift and bellow. When a new curve brings new "trouble", we have to remember that this situation, though troubling, is allowed by our heavenly Father to teach us, train us, and test us.

During this time I have been reading through Psalms. It has been a constant encouragement and support to me, but Psalm 62 reminds me that people are just people, and my solid foundation must be in the Lord.

"¹ Truly my soul silently waits for God; From Him comes my salvation. ² He only is my rock and my salvation; He is my defense; I shall not be greatly moved. ³ How long will you attack a man? You shall be slain, all of you, Like a leaning wall and a tottering fence. ⁴ They only consult to cast him down from his high position; They delight in lies; They bless with their mouth, But they curse inwardly. ⁵ My soul, wait silently for God alone, For my expectation is from Him. ⁶ He only is my rock and my salvation; He is my defense; I shall not be moved. ⁷ In God is my salvation and my glory; The rock of my strength, And my refuge, is in God. ⁸ Trust in Him at all times, you people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. ⁹ Surely men of low degree are a vapor, Men of high degree are a lie; If they are weighed on the scales, They arelighter than vapor. ¹⁰ Do not trust in oppression, Nor vainly hope in robbery; If riches increase, Do not set your heart on them. ¹¹ God has spoken once, Twice I have heard this: That power belongs to God. ¹² Also to You, O Lord, belongs mercy; For You render to each one according to his work."

In Him I will not be moved from the right path. In HIM, the attacks and adversity of men will not slay me. In HIM there is trust and salvation as well as a defense against troubling situations. Through this, He will mold me into the woman, wife, mother, friend, and servant that He desires I should be.

I'm sorry if this is preachy, and it doesn't specifically have anything to do with weight loss. But it's what's on my mind right now, and I hope it might be an encouragement to others who are also facing advercity or difficulty.

For those of you who know us, we continue to request your prayers. Pray that God will keep us true and give us wisdom to respond appropriately. And that if there is any sin in us that we are not aware of, that HE will show us where, so that we might serve HIM without hindrance.

Glad I did!

2011-02-04T05:53:00.000-08:00

We've all been there.

Those days, maybe weeks, when it is just so stinking hard to muster up enough drive to begin those workouts! We argue with ourselves about why we shouldn't, then lecture ourselves on why we should. Sometimes we meander around the house looking for chores to do as an excuse for putting off the inevitable:

"I just HAVE to get the laundry done today,"
"These dishes have been sitting here all morning, and I HAVE to do them first,"
"If I don't vacuum this floor now, I'll never do it!"

Well, this week that was me. Getting up the drive to start seemed so much harder this week. Even harder than it usually is!

On Sunday I fiddled around for a half hour after my daughter went to bed, trying to convince myself that getting out the bike was the right thing to do! Exuces exploded into my brain faster than I could put them down with this one common sense idea,

"...you are gaining too much weight, you need to workout..."

In the end, my better sense won out against my feelings, and I did it! All week I fought my heartfelt desire to be a couch potato and did those workouts!

And boy am I glad I did!

The result was a whopping 2 pound weight loss, bringing me now within 5 pounds of my pre-prego weight! It has not only made me very happy and giddy, but it has also spurned a new drive to workout and eat right during this pregnancy! I CAN lose weight and be pregnant at the same time!

Some of you may be feeling like you have so many other things to do you are starting to put working out on a lower priority; or perhaps you are telling yourself you just need a break; your body may be sore, and your brain tired and worn out, but don't give in!

In the end you need to ask yourself, "which do I want more; this free time to do something else, or to lose the weight?" These excuses are the reasons we have kept ourselves fat for so many years, and the only way to overcome them is to just do it!

Previous weight: 272
Weight loss: -2

Current weight: 270!!!

A Quotable Quote

2011-01-18T17:37:00.000-08:00

"Obesity is as much a disease as cancer. You have to approach the treatment of this disease as aggressively as you would any other life threatening disease!"

-based on a statement from Doctor Rob Huizenga on "The Biggest Loser"

I don't know about you all, but I LOVE LOVE LOVE to work out while watching the Biggest Loser. I've been following it, for the most part, since the first season, and I still love it!!!

They always have some convicting quotes, but this one (not exactly what he said, but basically) from Dr. Rob stuck out to me. I've never thought of my obesity in that light before, but he's right! This condition threatens your life and causes you to age prematurely, as well as keeping you from doing many of the things you might like to do!

We should be thankful that it is 100% curable, and do all we can to fight it!

To sleep......

2011-01-14T10:39:00.000-08:00

Ahhhh, to sleep! Everything looks brighter after a night full of restful slumber.

Unfortunately, I wouldn't know anything about that right now!

Sleep has not been forth coming as of late. My joints and muscles get cramped and achy very soon as the weight in my abdomen gets heavier. Picture a poor beached whale desperately trying to roll and sway from one uncomfortable side to the next, and you may have some idea of what I look like trying to readjust myself every 30 minutes or so!

Then, when that elusive wanderer finally lights on my conscious and I drift into oblivion, I am jerked awake by a hooligan leaping in my womb! If my unborn blessing decides to let me rest, my two year old angel decides she wants mommy at 3 in the morning! What monster could resist little whimpers of, "Mama....*sniff, Maamaaa....." in the middle of the night? I certainly can't. If I try to ignore it, she comes and scrapes mournfully on her bedroom door and calls to me!

The result of these sleepless nights (it's been going on for about 2 weeks now), is a very tired Mamma during the day. I've been taking naps in the afternoon when baby girl is down for hers, but I'm going to try and stop and hope that makes it easier for me to fall asleep when I lay down at night.

All I can say is, thank goodness for Charles Dickens. Without him I'd never be able to drift off to sleep at night!

2011: Week Two!

2011-01-14T10:28:00.000-08:00

Previous weight: 272
Current weight: 272
Weight loss: -0

Total weight loss: -33 pounds

Well, this week I am just very thankful that I did not gain any weight. My daughters birthday was this week and between baking, going out to Chinese Buffet (oh yum!), and being snowed in for a couple days, my eating was pretty bad. But the main thing is that I didn't keep track of my calories! I tried to compensate for big meals by little to no snacking, but it didn't help. Thankfully, I didn't gain anything because I worked out to try and offset the extra eating.

The only good things is that I fit in 4 days of workouts instead of 3. I added 1 walking day to my 3 biking days. Next week I will increase this to 2 walking days (Monday, Wednesday), in addition to the 3 days on the stationary bike (Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday).

As I said, I didn't gain anything. Considering what I ate that is good. I was able to stand on the doctor's scales and show that I had actually LOST a pound (I actually lost 3 pounds, but the doctor's scales are always a little high because you're fully clothed), in my 6th month of pregnancy! I'm hoping by next month I'll be back down to my starting weight!

Won't that be GRAND! To be 7 months pregnant and still at my starting weight! Such a feeling has to be better than chocolate, ice cream, or cheesecake----and that's what I'm counting on.

Tonight is pizza night, so I'm desperately trying not to nibble on anything between meals. The left over brownie with peanut butter frosting and ice cream in the freezer are screaming to me, but I'm not touching 'em!

2011: Week One!

2011-01-07T07:47:00.000-08:00

Well the first week of the new year has turned out to be quite interesting.

First: On the up side....

On Friday, December 31st I weighed myself and was up to 275 pounds. This ignited a fervor that can only be driven by panic! So Saturday I drew up a scheme for my new weight loss plan and Sunday I jumped in! The week has gone great! I stuck pretty close to my 1500 calorie diet, alternating the calorie amounts daily between 1300 and 1700. But the best thing were my workouts! I got in a half hour of biking in Sunday, Tuesday, and Thursday, and I plan on getting a half hour of walking in today.

I noticed some changes immediatly. Over the month of November and December my digestive system has been really off. This week eating right and working out regularly has helped to regulate my digestive system and I feel so much better!

But by far the biggest boon was today's weigh in! I lost 3 pounds this week! WOOHOO! I'm hoping to lose another 3 by my next doctor's appointment.

Secondly: However, not everything this week was peachy keen. But despite a few hardships, we remain optimistic that God is leading us where he wants us.

On Tuesday, my hubby was asked to resign from the job he's held for the past 5 1/2 years. At the moment we aren't destitute by any stretch of the imagination. They are paying him through the end of January, so he has a couple weeks to find a new job. We've had a lot of leads, and he's been following up on them this week. I know this is a bad time to be out of work, but I can't help but feel a tremendous peace. Sometimes I think I should be more concerned, but I'm excited to know what the Lord has in store for us and where He is going to take us!

Sleep: Some of the down sides of the third trimester are upon me! Sleep is an elusive visitor who comes to visit but rarely these days. It's hard to lay down for long periods of time, and I find myself waking up more often these days.

Sitting is also becoming very uncomfortable. Right now I'm stationed on a mountain of pillows, but I probably will only be blogging once or twice a week because it hurts to sit down for long periods of time.

Previous Weight: 275
Current Weight: 272

Weight loss this week: -3

Total weight loss: -32 pounds

Happy or Crappy new year?

2011-01-02T04:48:00.000-08:00

Last year at this time I took stock of my life and realized I need to change the way I lived or I would end up being a fat blog unable to play with my young children or even move around comfortably by the time I was 40.

The result was a 40 pound weight loss in 2010! Not bad, but not as much as it could have been . I got pregnant in August and let that become an excuse to slack off. So far I have reaped the benefits of my laziness, and have gained back 10 pounds.

So once again, here we are taking stock and reevaluating. I've crunched my numbers and discovered I have been eating well over 2000 calories per day! Since I only burn about 2100, it's no wonder I'm gaining weight like a young bull elephant!

Right now my greatest trial is getting back into the habit of tracking my calories! I'm supposed to be taking in 1500 a day, not 2000. This week is really going to be my first big push toward total tracking!

Also, if I want to lose 2lbs a week, I need to increase my calorie output by 300 calories at least! If I don't, I will probably still be able to lose 1 pound a week, but I'm going to get really weak and squishy again.

Eating: 1500 calories max: to detox my system from all the sugar and yuck I've been eating, I'm going to do what I did last year the first 2 weeks of my weight loss. It's based on the "Nutrition for Life" program, and focuses on the balance of nutrition that you take in. You eat every 2-3 hours throughout the day for a total of 6 small meals.

Breakfast: 1 carb/ 1 protien
Snack 1: 1 carb/1 protien
Lunch: 1 carb/1 protien/ 1-2servings of veggies
Snack 2: 1 carb/1protien
Dinner: 1 carb/1 protien/ 1-2 servings of veggies
Snack 3: 1/carb/1 protien.

The only difference I will be making is the amount of veggies. I can have fruit for my carbs, but I will probably be adding veggies to a few of the "snacks" as well as the meals. This is due to pregnancy and the need for extra vitamins and nutrients.

Workouts:

Cardio: Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday: Starting at--bike for 1/2 an hour at a medium intensity. I've really gotten weak, and being pregnant I don't want to push it to a high intensity to soon. Things pull easily :-P
Weights: Very limited: I can do my arms, calves, shoulders, and thighs without pulling too much on my abdomen. My preggo belly is getting really big, so anything like crunches or bench pressing is out. Don't worry, I'll only be working with 5 pound weights in each hand. That's only 10 pounds, and shouldn't hurt anything unless I'm combining it with other motions that pull and tug sensitive areas.

I will continue this program for about 2 weeks, and then reevaluate what I want to do.

Weigh in days: Friday

January 7th
January 14th

The hardest part is going to be my daughters birthday on the 11th! I think I'm going to put off celebrating it until the 14th, though, so I can have some cake!

"Has anyone seen my motivation?"

2010-12-17T10:58:00.000-08:00

I'm sitting here with my good friend brutally honest and we're about to get down to business. I don't like whining, so I hope this doesn't sound too much like it. It's more of a confessional. I'm really very ashamed of myself and the habits I have slipped into over the holiday season.

Where I've been Lately: Many pregnant women fall into a habit of thinking, "I'm pregnant, I can afford the calories!" Lately, much to my surprise, I have caught myself living with this kind of attitude. Not consciously, but my eating certainly reflects a similar way of thinking.

It's only taken place over the past few weeks. I was doing very well up until Thanksgiving. Eating well, counting Carb points (more on that later), and even walking 3-4 times a week (up until December 9th I was only allowed a moderate walk for exercise--see previous post for more info). Up until last month I had not gained any weight! Then BOOM! Thanksgiving and the Christmas Season!

Between the baking, shopping, parties, and outings with the gals, my eating and workout habits have become quite slovenly this month.

The problem here is that I'm having trouble getting myself back into a healthy way of living. I don't want to put it off until after the holidays, though I hear some do. I'd like to maintain my weight or lose some between now and my next doctor's appointment. But it's like my motivation has just fizzled. Nothing really tragic or awful has happened to make me start pigging out, I'm just healthy living lazy!

Don't get me wrong, I'm busy as can be. This is actually the first day this week my daughter and I have been able to stay home and I have a ton of stuff to do. But I am really lazy at planning meals and regular workouts.

The Truth of the matter: Motivation is not a magic potion that we take when it wears off! It's a conscious decision we make to do the right thing! Instead of deciding to dig my fox hole on this hill and not retreat, I've been avoiding the issue and making excuses!

Now........: I'm deciding to not be health lazy. If we look for excuses we will always certainly find them for whatever we don't want to do. But the bottom line is what I've said in the past; we have to be willing to do what WE need to do in order to stay/get healthy. For me right now, that is tracking my eating, taking my vitamins (yuck), and finding a good workout that won't jar things to seriously. Starting up on this blog again is my first step in focusing my motivation/determination once again.

Is my face red?

2010-12-16T22:03:00.000-08:00

I'm almost embarrased by how much time has slipped away from me. If you've followed this blog at all you know that despite struggling with PCOS I am pregnant!

Here's a quick update of how things have been going:

First Trimester: Sick sick sick! My stomach was upset pretty much all the time, and being on the computer made it worse. This is when I stopped blogging or even reading blogs. For a while I didn't even check email or Facebook! It lasted a bit into my second Trimester, but has now tapered off, thank goodness! The best part though, was that I didn't gain any weight throughout the first part of my pregnancy, even though I wasn't able to work out a whole lot! YAY!

Second Trimester: this is where we are now. It has been interesting.

1. Blood sugar! I failed my first glucose test, and started counting carbs to prevent gestational diabetes. My sister had it with her first two pregnancies, and I didn't want to get taken by surprise. I passed the second test, but I'm still trying to watch the sugar/Carb intake so it doesn't become a problem
2. Previa! Just when I was getting back into working out, my first ultrasound showed that my placenta was a low and touching my cervix. The Docs said it would correct itself, but that I had to take it easy until it did. No dance aerobics, just a moderate walk and no heavy lifting. That put a damper on my workouts. Thankfully, I have just gotten the good news that my placenta is now clear clear of my cervix, so I can start working out a bit more. Now I just need to get back into the habit of working out regularly
3. Food! Now that the nasea is passed food is becoming a HUGE issue. I want to eat everything. Sweets, MEAT, pasta, pizza....when I see something, I want it! This is bad. Really really bad. So I try to only keep healthy things around to snack on and I'm only drinking Water and the occasional milk, tea, or decaf coffee. No soda, no juice...not even flavored water.
4. GENDER!!!!! IT'S A GIRL!!!
5. Most Powerful/Weird Cravings: MEAT MEAT MEAT---I'm not usually a big meat eater, but apparently my baby is!

Weight Confessional: I have gained 6 pounds this trimester. I spoke with my Doctor about it today, and she said she wasn't TOO concerned, but she would prefer that I remain stationary. That basically means I'm not supposed to gain any weight. I knew this would be an issue. To accomplish this, you have to actually LOSE weight at the same rate you GAIN baby weight. I haven't been.

So here I am, back at the blog trying to sort things out again. I need to get back on an eating and work out plan that I can manage throughout my pregnancy. I will post more about that after I've hammered out the specifics.

That's it in a nutshell! Lots of other things happening, but that should bring you up to date! I can't wait to get back into reading all your blogs, now that the computer does make my head spin like I'm on a roller coaster!

Current Weight: 268
Weight gain: +6 :-( help me!

Total weight loss: 37 pounds

Tomorrow: "Has anyone seen my motivation?"

My Second award!

2010-12-16T20:49:00.000-08:00

I am finally getting around to catching up on this blog. It has been a loooooong time, and I'll tell you all about it really soon, but first things first!

Before I got pregnant and the computer made me seasick, I received a few awards! I would like to thank Mona at More Milestones for this award (though she may be wondering now why she gave it to such a lazy blogger :-P) Make sure you swing by her blog and give it a look!

1. Share 7 things about yourself:

I like to drink milk when I eat pizza
I have an almost 2 year old daughter
I am 23 weeks pregnant with my second child
I have been a Red Sox fan since my great-grandparents starting watching them back in 1918
My favorite author is Jane Austen.
I have read the entire Harry Potter series.
I do NOT like hot summer weather!

2. Pass the award along to 15 bloggers who you have recently discovered and who you think are fantastic for whatever reason.

At the Starting line...

Wait! It's all about the numbers.

ColorMePink

Oh My Aches and Pains!
The Hungry Girl's Diary
Sky's the Limit Scraps
Nana Diana Takes a Break

Musings of a Mommie
Julie's Journey
Homesteading On the Internet

Choosing Freedom

No link back is necessary! I think all these blogs are great, and deserve this award. I could have listed a dozen or so more that really get me motivated and help me keep my focus. Thank you so much for sharing your hard work with others.

Short and sweet

2010-08-21T10:45:00.000-07:00

This has not been a good week for me. I'm starting to get nausea throughout the day, and I feel at least a little sick almost all the time. Good for trying to keep the calories down, bad for working out. I haven't worked out at all. It's been all I could do to get some cleaning done, take care of baby girl, and walk the dog.

The up side? I did lose a pound! Probably because I usually don't feel like eating anything. However, I'm a good prego-woman, and I know I need to eat even when I don't feel like it. I only skipped one meal (supper on Wednesday), and I paid for it. By the time we got home that night I was famished, and that made me feel even worse because I was sick AND hungry. UGH! So, I make myself eat a little something, but it's usually small and simple.

I'm going to really work on walking this week. 5 driveway laps, (a little more than 1000 steps), every evening. I walked a lot with my first pregnancy. It's not too strenuous, and I can do it even if I feel like I'm going to throw up (which is just about every day now).

That's it! Sorry I haven't been posting much, but I really haven't felt much up to sitting at the computer.

Current weight: 262lbs
Weight Lost:: -1lbs

Total Weight lost: -43 pounds

A happy morning Weigh in!

2010-08-13T07:46:00.000-07:00

This is a busy day, but I wanted to take a minute and "weigh in" on my weigh-in! It was great! As you know I settled my scale issues last week, and we got a new battery just to be sure. I set my current weight at 265, because I wasn't sure I'd been getting an accurate reading.

The past week has been really good. Baby girl and I have been eating really well throughout the day, and I've been giving myself some dark chocolate and tea in the evenings, and that seems to be keeping the urge to eat at bay.

The result? I lost weight! A fantastic 2 pounds! That's the most I've lost in well over a month, and the first weight I've lost in 3 weeks! WOOHOO!

I'm still feeling really drained, but I'm trying to get in some good 45 minute workouts. Of course, we're walking every day. I'm hoping for good things this week, and that I can lose a few more pounds before I start gaining any baby weight.

Current Weight: 263
Weight Lost: -2

Total Weight Lost: -42

A Goal Achieved!!!!

2010-08-12T05:04:00.000-07:00

On my "Weight Loss Plan" page, I list some of my long term goals. Here they are...

"My Long term Goals and Rewards: no specific time frame

Health: Lower risk of diabetes, heart disease, and various cancers including breast and ovarian cancer. Decrease Knee pain. Lose 155lbs.
Pregnancy: increase chances of getting pregnant and be way cute as a preggo woman! (I have polycystic ovarian syndrome)
Activity: Be able to bike and hike with my family. I want my hubby to be able to carry me. I want to race my daughter when she is 10 years old and wicked fast! Be able to ride on rollar coasters again! (yea, I’ve gotten that big! They can’t buckle me in!)
Clothes: Be able to find cute clothes at thrift stores. Wear a sundress. Get down to a size 10/12

I don't know how many of you read my post on my struggles with PCOS. If you haven't you can find it here. This condition has always made it VERY hard for me to get pregnant. When I found out about it, I had a good cry. Then I began reading up on ways to increase fertility. One of the most successful was maintain a good healthy diet and regular exercise habits. Both things I have never done consistently. In several articles I read that even a 5-10% weight loss can increase your fertility!

But after an emotional and tear filled journey through infertility, I was able to get pregnant, (even though I stubbornly stuck to my old eating habits). But I had to have all the cysts drained before I could! It was expensive even with insurance, and we didn't see how we could do it on one income with no insurance.

After my first daughter was born, it took me a year and a half of not being able to get pregnant again before I took my obesity seriously. When the fact that I would probably never get pregnant on my own if I didn't lose weight finally drove home to my thick brain, I started to change the way I ate and exercised. That was back in January.

40 pounds later, the unimaginable happened! My first positive pregnancy test since having my daughter---accomplished with NO SURGERY! We found out this past Sunday, and incidentally-- it was also my husband's birthday!

Since then I have had an official clinical test (which is just a glorified home pregnancy test), and it was confirmed!

I am pregnant!

Now, I don't know how cute a pregnant woman I'll make. I'm still 110 pounds overweight. But I'm so excited to have another baby, I don't even care that I'll look like a blimp!

Despite my success, there are still serious health concerns.

I am way overweight, and I need to continue to lose weight while I'm pregnant. I did this with my first pregnancy. I started out at 305 pounds. During the pregnancy I got up to 325 pounds, but a few days after Baby Girl was born, I had dropped down to 295! I lost 10 pounds of "me" while gaining 30 pounds of baby weight! This time around, I hope I will lose more. I won't get an accurate account of how much I've lost until the baby is born. Until then, I'll be gaining baby weight while hopefully losing "me" weight.

Also, Women with PCOS are 45% more likely to have a miscarriage, and very often get gestational diabetes. It is now more important than ever that I maintain my healthy living habits. In fact, there are a few changes I need to make:

1. Calorie Consumption: I may need to increase my calories a bit. Lately I've been taking in 1500. But baby takes 300-500, so that would only leave 1200 or less for me. Once I get on Medicaid, I'm going to talk to my doctor about how many calories I should be consuming to keep my metabolism up so I can still lose weight. I'll tell you, this is extremely tricky while you're pregnant. Once the cravings start, it's so hard to limit what you eat! Until I see the doctor, I'm going to stick to 1800 calories. This should be enough, without being too much.

2. Sugar Intake: PCOS messes with insulin, which is the hormone that regulates blood sugar. I need to lesson my sugar intake to almost nothing. We've already switched back to unsweetened iced tea, and I'm cutting out dessert on Sunday (the only day I've been allowing myself a little something.) I put a teaspoon in my morning hot tea, but I think I'm going to cut that out too. From now on, it's only natural sugars from fruit!

3. Staying Active: Those who have been pregnant know that extreme exhaustion you get in the beginning of your pregnancy. My workouts have been sporadic, because I just feel sooooo tired! But I need to make sure I'm getting in my workouts consistently. I will probably add a longer walk to the one I've been doing every day.

4. Getting enough sleep: I hate going to bed early, but I don't want to take naps during the day. I need to make sure I'm getting to bed early enough to get a good nights sleep.

These are a few that I've already begun to implement. I'm sure there will be more once I talk with the doctor. Please keep me in your prayers. I cant' wait to have another one of these....

Bible Encouragement for Losers

2010-08-10T19:29:00.000-07:00

I've been wanting to post some of the things I am learning in my own studies that have been an encouragement and conviction to me as I struggle to live a healthier more diciplined life. This is just a little thought for today.

I Samuel 16:6-7 --

"So it was, when they came, that he looked at Eliab and said, “Surely the LORD’s anointed is before Him! But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the LORD does not see as man sees;for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”

Prior to these verses God sends the prophet Samuel to anoint the next King from among the sons of Jesse. The first son, Eliab, comes forward. All physical appearance, stature, and rights of birth tickle Samuel's fancy. Surely this strapping young man must be the Lord's anointed. I think it's safe to say Eliab was quit a good looking guy! Strong, tall, and imposing!

But God does not look at our outward appearance; how tall, pretty, handsome, strong, or stately we are. He looks at our heart! This is an incredibly comforting thought to me. Other people may interpret us by what we look like, but God never will. He looks at our minds and hearts; our thoughts, beliefs, motivations...all the things other people cannot see! It doesn't matter to God what I look like on the outside; it matters that I am doing my best to honor Him with my habits, and keeping my spirit and mind pure!

But there is also a challange there. If I workout and eat healthy only to get a fab body so people will look at me and say, "wow," but I ignore my relationship with my Savior, I have failed! My mind and spirit must be strengthened as well as my body. This means spending as much time in the Word (Holy Bible) as I do working out or on the computer.

Only He can see our hearts, and knows what's going on inside our heads. As Christians, our first priority should be to make what He looks at, beautiful. What everyone else sees, should be a secondary priority.

Kristy Bucks!

2010-08-10T06:38:00.000-07:00

Well this is something unexpected and totally awesome! On Sunday I got a message from my best buddy, Kristy. She has always been one of my best cheerleaders, and she's also a fellow weight loser. She's almost reached her goal of going from 147-125, and she wanted to give me some extra encouragement on my own weight loss journey.

So she has given me a generous challenge! For every pound I lose, from this point on, she's going to give me $1!!! So, when I reach my goal weight, I will have some extra cash to buy new clothes!

I have made a ticker at the top of my page to track how many "Kristy Bucks" I've earned, hehehe. Thank you so much Kristy! You are the bestest!

A lovely giveaway!

2010-08-07T17:51:00.000-07:00

No, it's not mine :-P I have yet to get into that bit of fun. But it is from Erika over at Fat Like Me!

The Prize: A $40 gift certificate to CSN stores! I had never heard of them before, but just look at all this great baby stuff! Not to mention the Health and Fitness Junk! I have to admit, I would probably spend it on baby stuff, not health and fitness junk, hehehe. But still, I am so entering!

The contest ends August 19th, so get your butt in gear! (can I say butt?)

Workout free Friday (via saturday morning)

2010-08-07T01:11:00.000-07:00

Well, I have good news and bad news.

The bad news is I did not lose any weight this week...that I know of. At this point, I am really not sure what I weigh, exactly.

The good news is, I THINK I've solved my scale issues. This morning I got up early, and weighed myself. It said I was back up to 268! That's a 6 pound weight gain in one week. Now, if numbers mean anything, that's impossible. So, I waited a while and weighed myself again. It was down to 264.

I wondered, "What in the world would make it shift so much in less than an hour?" So I decided to not eat breakfast and weigh myself after we went grocery shopping. Don't worry, I'm not going in for starvation, I just needed to know what was up with my scale!

A couple hours later (remember I haven't eaten ANYTHING after being 264), I got home and weighed myself again. Imagine my surprise when it was back up to 267! I realized there was something seriously wrong. On a whim, I moved the scale to another section of the bathroom floor, only about a foot to the right. IT WENT DOWN TO 262!! This summer has been extremely humid and wet, and it has made the linoleum in our floor bulge in places. I didn't think anything of it, until yesterday morning when I realized it has been affecting the balance of our scales!

So, I took the scales in the kitchen; a nice, smooth, flat surface; and weighed myself one more time. It was right in the middle at 265.

So, I'm not sure if I ever really got down to 262, but at least now I have a better idea of where I am. I'm setting my weight now at 265, and going from there.

Now, I don't measure my healthy living success only through weight loss. I measure success by how much work I have put in. It's taken me a looooooong time to realize this, but I know that if I put in the work and don't lose anything that week, I haven't failed.

This week was good. I ate well, and worked out 4 days for 45 minutes of intense cardio. That's not as much as I want to be doing, but it's a whole lot more than what I HAVE been doing. So I couldn't be mad at myself, or wonder what I could have done better. I put the work in, I wouldn't get depressed about the scales, no matter how much my emotions wanted me to.

Still.....just to be sure.....we're also changing the battery on the stupid scales.

Current Weight: Only God knows for sure. I'm saying 265
Weight loss this week: ????

Total Pounds lost: 40

Catching up!

2010-08-04T12:13:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago I received my first blog award! I was very excited, said thank you, and all, but it took me a while to gather the list of blogs I wanted to pass it on to, hehehe. But FINALLY! here it is!

Thank you, Mona, for this award! It was unexpected, unlooked for, but truly made me feel wonderful! Go and check her out at More Milestones.

The Rules:

1) Sum up your blogging philosophy, motivation, and experience in 5 words:

encouraging, convicting, supporting, silly, listening

2) Pass it on to 10 other Amazing blogs!--- I love blogs that have a lot of heart, a lot of truth, and/or are wholesome and family friendly. These are just a few of the great ones that I've found. I chose them because they are blogs that keep me coming back.

Take this yolk from me?????

2010-08-03T20:14:00.000-07:00

Okay! It's 10:35, I haven't eaten since supper (around 5:30), and my tummy is growling. I'm chugging water to shut it up, and it seems to be helping, but I'm having trouble falling asleep because I'm a little hungry.

Sitting here reading weight loss blogs, healthy eating tips, and work out tricks- one burning question keeps popping up in my mind...

"TO YOLK OR NOT TO YOLK!?"

I see a lot of people eat eggs for breakfast, as I do myself at least once a week. My best friend and I have had this discussion many times. I know Jillian Michaels advocates removing the yolk and sticking with the whites. I know that for years many dietitians and trainers have hailed this as a battle cry, but is it really as beneficial as they say?

The more I research it, the more I am convinced they are dead wrong! Sure if you measure nutrition by calories and fat alone, I guess you could make a case for ripping out half of your vitamins and nutrients, but personally, I want that healthy stuff! To show you what I mean, here are some pictures that show the comparison of the white vs. the whole egg.

From SparkPeople.com:

From Calorie count.com

As you can see, the egg white has almost no fat. No saturated fat, but also no healthy fat either! And while it is much lower in calories, it has about 1/2 the protein! But the biggest deal breaker for me, check out all the healthy vitamins and nutrients listed in the Whole egg from SparkPeople! Vitamin B-12, Iron, Zinc, and look at all that Riboflavin! (an important vitamin in metabolism and burning off carbs!).

Do all these nutritionists and experts want us to give up all that good stuff for the sake of a few calories, some milk sodium, and a few grams of healthy fat? I was actually disappointed that Caloriecount.com gave the egg white a higher nutrition grade the the whole egg! It seems there is a conspiracy against the poor yolk! And all it wants to do is give you a whooooole bunch of good stuff to help combat hunger and keep us healthy!

My verdict:

Unless you suffer from high cholesterol or some other specific disease or health issue that is irritated by eating egg yolks, tell the anti-yolkers to take a hike and CHOMP 'EM DOWN WITH A SATISFIED SMILE! (But remember to always consult your doctor in such cases :-)

What do you think? Am I waaaaaay off base here? Or am I right in believing that the numbers speak for themselves?

Post any articles or information you might have about this debate, and let me know your thoughts!

Goal Achievement Suggestions

2010-08-03T06:51:00.000-07:00

This is going to be short and sweet, I'm rushing to get out the door! But I've been thinking a lot about goal rewards. When I first started I set some, but then when I achieved them I couldn't spend the money to get my reward!

I need suggestions! What can be a reward that you don't have to spend money on. I'll be perfectly honest, my husband and I are on a shoestring budget. We have no extra cash for me to spend on manicures, shoes, a new outfit, or even a hair cut for that matter :-P But I have a big milestone coming up soon (50 pound mark), and I need something to look forward to!

So let me hear from all you creative people! What can I give myself that won't cost anything?

Do you get Monday blues or buzz?

2010-08-02T11:09:00.000-07:00

I know Monday has gotten a bad rap over the years. When I was teaching I would dread Mondays. Having to get up early to go teach children about Shakespeare and Milton, after two days of being able to sleep in!? It wasn't my best day of the week, and I'd get sooooooooo depressed! Yup, I was just another victim of the Monday Blues.

But now everything is different! as a stay-at-home mom, Monday's are now my day to catch up at home after my crazy busy weekends! Friday, Saturday and Sunday are now my busiest days of the week! I usually have to get up earlier on those days, and Monday is now my day to sleep in! I get such a buzz on Monday morning because I usually don't have to go anywhere or keep to any kind of strict schedule! It's fantastic! I get so pumped up, I usually end up cleaning the entire house!

Today before noon I've already scrubbed the bathroom, caught up on the dishes, vacuumed the living room, hallway, dining room, and Baby girl's room, cleaned the kitchen floor and scrubbed the counter, stoves, and cupboards, AND got in a load of laundry that is currently hanging up all over the house (our dryer died and it's rainy today)!

Topping off my happiness- the weather has been in the 70's all weekend, and shouldn't get much higher today!

Can I get a BOOYA!

I'm so happy, I don't even mind that I still need to do an upper body workout some time today. Yesterday I did 45 minutes on the bike, and felt delightfully exhausted. I'm just too happy to be cool and sitting in a clean house!

Wobble Wobble Weight and a Workout Free Friday

2010-07-30T10:49:00.000-07:00

The Weight Wobble!

Okay, I've been delaying this all day, but I'm just going to sit down and type it. I don't know what to say. I'm fairly certain I didn't lose anything this week, but I'm not really sure of anything beyond that. According to the scale the day before yesterday I was up 4 pounds from last Friday, then yesterday I was down to my regular weight of 262, then today I gained 3 pounds..... since yesterday (which is impossible unless I'm retaining fluid). Then I weighed myself again a bit later and I was back down to my regular weight. AAAARGH!

I'm not really sure what is making my weight go all funky. I always weigh myself under the same conditions. My hormones could be going nuts, I have been a little flaky as of late. But I think it may be time to change the batteries in my scale. It has bee 6 months.

Do you ever have these Wobbly Weight Weeks?

Rundown for this week:

I got 3 workouts in this week, which is not where I want to be, but more than what I have been doing. The lower body killed my legs, but I was able to come back and do cardio the next day! WOOT!

My foot is still giving me grief, but I'm trying to push through it. I was very careful this week not to eat after supper. I've been drinking a ton of water, mostly because it's so hot my body is craving it.

Weight: Not sure, we'll say the same as last week

Who would have thunk it!?

2010-07-26T10:41:00.000-07:00

Yesterday at church I got a pleasant, but startling, shock. My pastor's wife came up to me after church and said, "You are looking really good! You can tell you've lost weight!" That in and of itself wouldn't have hit me. Though it's still gratifying and encouraging to hear it, quite a few people have told me the same thing. But then, she added, "I overheard someone today saying that Marie was looking skinnier and skinnier!"

Well that REALLY threw me for a loop! Why? you might ask? All my life I've been conditioned to think of myself as the fatty. My perspective of myself was based on how I assumed other people saw me. While I know such feelings are totally self centered and rarely based on fact. it's always been my feeling that people look at me and think about how fat I am. I've never even thought of myself in relation to the word 'skinnier' before! To hear that other people are looking at me, and thinking about how skinny I am getting is something I can't really wrap my mind around. It's like someone just told me what I always thought was the color red is really blue!

I'm still trying to get a handle on it. It's not easy to change the way you view yourself, and even harder to change the way you think others see you. This new perspective has done more to boost my will to lose weight than anything else that has happened so far. It also made me feel guilty because I haven't been working out like I'm supposed to, or counting calories consistently.

Today I awoke with renewed vision! I've already worked out, and it felt great--even though I felt my legs were going to give out from underneath me and my head was dizzy, hehe. Right now I need water and then laundry!

How have your perspectives and impressions about yourself changed since you started?

Rhett&Link!

2010-07-25T21:43:00.000-07:00

My husband and I have become quite taken with the "internetainers" Rhett and Link!

This chuckle fest is one of Hubby's favorites! "The BBQ song"!

For some of you it may be informative.

I'm a relocated Maineiac, and my best friend's mom made a lip smackin' BBQ sauce. But rather than tearing apart a piece of pig, we slathered it on chicken and cooked it on the Barbecue grill. That was our BBQ! I never saw all that chopped up saucy stuff until I came down to NC for college (and never left). Quite frankly, I've always thought it looked gross! All that soggy mess mixed up together....who knew WHAT I was ingesting! I kept expecting to pull out bone bits or slips of skin and fat blobs!

I have since overcome my fears; mostly because it tastes wicked good. But I still hold that BBQ IS a VERB. And I have dictionary. com on my side! So there you Southern Boys!

What do you all think? Where do you fall into the Great National BBQ debate? Make sure you 'weigh in' on this important discussion!

(see how I compromised there? I really do prefer the gender neutrality of "y'all" over "you guys," but I can't bring myself to drawl y'all.)

(More chuckles with Rhett and Link HERE! )

Workout free friday!

2010-07-23T15:19:00.000-07:00

Well here we go! I haven't been blogging about what's going on, because I've been working on the #31DBBB challenge (though I'm a day or two behind). So here is the run down!

Dumb Dumb Dumb: may be a little gross for weak stomachs!
Okay, so here's Rie's dumb blunder for the week. Last Saturday I was trying to cut apart some frozen biscuits that had stuck together. I arranged it so the knife would go away from my hand if it slipped, but I didn't reckon on my hand slipping too! CURSE YOU PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY! The knife went left and my left hand went right. Sure enough! They met in the middle, like two lonely lovers searching for the meaning of life. The jagged edge chopped into the fleshy part of my left middle finger-top digit. It gouged a rough little flap open and what was inside oozed out a bit. UGH! It looked even grosser than it sounds. My 4 year old nephew was standing next to me when I happened, and I think it scared him quite a bit, poor thing. I probably should have gone and gotten it stitched up, but I am currently without insurance. So, we iced it, poured peroxide on it, loaded it with Triple Antibiotic gel, and then bandaided it!

So far so good! It hasn't gotten infected, and it is healing nicely :-) What have I learned from all this? BUY THE WAL-MART BRAND OF FROZEN BISCUITS! Oh yea, and thaw them out before trying to cut them apart, hehe.

Overwhelming Conditions:
It is HOT here. lately it's been getting up in the high 90's almost every afternoon. As a result, I'm sweating like crazy all day long! On the up side, my body is craving water. I'm drinking a ton of it! I don't even want anything else. Sugary drinks sound disgusting and thick to me right now, and all I can think of is water and unsweetened tea! I've no doubt it will pass soon enough, so I'll enjoy it while I can, until the overwhelming desire for a coke washes over me!

EXERCISE has not been going well. I'm almost ashamed to admit it, but I've had another workout free week. Don't hit me! I had a reason! (*ducks to avoid the smack). But my foot is much better now (so long as Baby Girl doesn't step on it and I avoid strappy sandles), so I should be back to my regular workout schedule Saturday.

EATING has been going okay. I didn't really count calories this week, but I'm still doing well avoiding nightly snack binges, and keeping my portions small when I do eat. This seems to be working well for me, though I need to make sure my calorie count stays below 1800.

The worst part of all? I didn't lose any weight. I'm still 263. This coming week has got to be a good one. Super careful and super controlled. Workouts everyday, and careful food tracking. We are not only 8 pounds away from the 50 pounds mark, and only 13 pounds away from 250! We are NOT slowing down now!

Weight Loss: -0/+0
Current weight: 263

Total Weight lost: -42 pounds

Next Friday I hope I have better success to report. Until then, happy healthy!

Rie

Growing healthy kids!

2010-07-20T08:56:00.000-07:00

Recently I read a post at Weight Loss is no Fairy Tail, about the lack of nutrition in our children's diet. We as parents have a huge responsibility to teach our children how to eat. These little people were entrusted to our care by God, and he has given us the task of raising them in spiritual, mental, and physical health. It is not only a neglect of our responsibility as parents to teach our children bad eating habits, but it is also cruel! I'm not saying they should never have a brownie or pizza, but those things should be treats on special occasions, not everyday staples! Being an obese person trying to live a healthier life, I am determined to do better with my own daughter.

Here are some tips that I have picked up along the way that may help you when considering your own child's eating habits:

1. Every child is different. Be aware of your child's specific nutritional needs.

2. Consider your child's body type, and work FOR them to discover what type of foods they need and what types of things they need to avoid.

3. Consult your child's physician as to what foods you should be giving your child, and THEN TAKE THEIR ADVICE!

4. Always keep in mind the Food Pyramid: read more about that here

5. You are the adults! Give your children what they NEED, not what they WANT.

Healthy Snack Ideas:

Now, I am a fairly new mommy, and I'm always on the lookout for yummy, healthy, and of course quick snack ideas for my daughter and me. I don't like food prep, but I am determined to rise above the processed 100 calorie small portion junk food, and strive for real wholesome snacks that give nutrition and satisfy cravings.

Here are some of my favorite snacks for my daughter and myself.

1. Apple sauce: try to find some without any sugar added. Naturally sweet is always best!

2. Rice Chex and raisins: This one actually took my by suprise. Chex is loaded with IRON! My daughter tends to be low in iron, and I was pleasantly suprised to find that Chex has a good chunk of it per serving! I give it to her dry with some raisens and she gobbles it up!

3. Low-fat Vanilla Yogurt and fruit: It's sweet and cool, and loaded with protien. I usually give her some with grapes, bananas, or apples. But you can use just about any fruit.

4. Frozen Green grapes: you have GOT go give these a try. They are delicious, and so satisfying on a hot day!

5. Peanut butter and celery: If you don't like celery, peanut butter also goes great with apples and bananas!

6. Ice cream and fruit: 1/2 cup Bryers vanilla ice cream + 1 sliced apple--sprinkle with cinnamon!

7. Granola and milk: Some people shy away from granola because of the carbs, but it's actually very healthy, and loaded with fiber!

8. Part skim Mozzarella cheese + Whole grain Saltines: Add some sliced lean meat for some extra protein.

9. Salsa and whole grain Tortilla chips: (my daughter still has trouble with the hard crunchy chips, so I'll give her a cracker instead)

10. Sour cream and Cucumbers: these are especially nice on a hot day!

This list is by no means extensive, and I would love to hear from you! What are your favorite snack ideas, for kids or adults? How do you satisfy your sweet or salty cravings? What tips do you have for parents looking to better their child's nutritional intake?

#31DBBB: Day 1-Write an Elevator pitch!

2010-07-20T07:26:00.000-07:00

I am usually very wary of challenges. My blogging is sporadic because I don't consider spending extravagant amounts of time on the computer a good use of my time. I feel if I am going to invest in people's lives I should be doing it face to face with people I know and love.

But this blog is a way for me to remember and stay focused on the task at hand. Lately I have slowly been disconnecting from that purpose and task. So when I saw this challenge at SITS girls on BlogFrog, I decided to commit to it as a way of reconnecting to my purpose. Namely, losing weight and developing a more disciplined, godly lifestyle.

It's going to be hard, because I don't even check my email every day, let alone work on my blog! Also, we may be moving here in a few weeks, so I don't know if I'll be able to why we are in transit. But I believe this will help me get back into losing weight while I enhance my effectiveness as a blogger.

So let's play catch-up!!!

DAY 1: WRITE AN ELEVATOR PITCH

Short elevator pitch: "Fighting through the fat to the glory of God..."

Long elevator Pitch: It's easy to be lazy. It takes no thought, no planning, and no commitment! But if we are always lazy and unplanned, our success is based on chance and nothing more. The God of the Bible is one of order and discipline; structure and design! To represent such a Lord, we need to live lives that reflect that order, structure, and discipline. My first step to that is trimming the fat that has weighted me down both physically and mentally all these years. I get excited when others join me in this journey, and I hope to inspire teens, women and men to live their lives to the glory of God, particularly in the area of weight loss.

Workout free friday!

2010-07-16T06:06:00.000-07:00

Okay, okay....so it's really been workout free week :-P I'm not sure what I did to it, but I've messed up something in my foot. It hurts to walk, set my foot flat on the floor, and even when I lay down it hurts if it's not laying sideways! I've been trying to take it easy, but it's easier to say stay off your feet than it is to do. So I've been cleaning and trying to be active, without putting too much pressure on my foot.

On the up side, I have made progress in my eating habits. I've managed to keep myself from eating at night. I started having the snack that I would normally have at night in the afternoon instead. It seems to be helping. I lost 1 lb this week!

I have to cut this short. Today I am getting ready to have my niece and nephew for 3 days, and I still have some cleaning to do. Hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

Weight loss: -1 lbs
Current weight: 264 lbs

Total weight lost: 41 pounds

Weigh-in and Workout Free Friday!

2010-07-09T10:05:00.000-07:00

As I sit here enjoying a frozen fruit pop on Workout Free Friday, I reflect with joy on this past week. I made a really big effort to workout every day, and it payed off! I lost 2 pounds, AND hit another 10 pound mark! It's weeks like this that keep me going. I get so frustrated because it takes forever for the weight to come off. I can hardly believe the first 50lb mark is only 10 pounds away, and that 250 is only 15 pounds a way.

Losing all this weight has made me more than a little thoughtful about how my weight has changed and shifted over the years.

This is a little run down of my weight history:

3rd grade: average 75lb kid

4th grade: overweight 116lb kid. I'm not sure what happened. Not much changed in my life that year, but for some reason I started gaining weight and never stopped.

End of Jr. High: 180lbs

End of high school: 200lbs

1999-end of my first year of college: 200lbs!

2002-end of my 3rd year of college: 220lbs

2003: when I got married/end of my fourth year of college: 250lbs

2006-07: Graduation from college and first year teaching: 270lbs

April 2009-Right after surgery and right before I got pregnant: 30lbs

December 2009-full term: 320lbs

January 2010-after delivery: 290lbs

December 2010: Back up to 305!

Although in the past I had little drops here and there, for the most part is has always gone up over longer periods of time. Once in a while I would drop 10-20 pounds in a few weeks, but I've never been able to maintain a steady weight LOSS over a long period of time.

That is, until this year. Not only am I almost at the 50 pound mark, but we also just passed the 6 month mark in June! For 6 months I have steadily and consistently been losing weight!

What has made the difference? My attitude toward the whole idea of living healthy.

1. I used to think it wasn't fair because I had to work harder than other people to stay in shape. I felt like I wasn't given a fair shot. My attitude was that God should change my body, not that I should change my habits. But this year I accepted who God made me and realized He has a special plan for me. And right now, part of His plan is living a disciplined, ordered lifestyle that is honoring to Him.

2. I used to think that I would diet and eat healthy until I got down to the size I wanted to be, then I could eat how I wanted again. DUMB DUMB DUMB! Now I realize that healthy living isn't just something you do to lose a few pounds, it's a lifetime process that you commit to PERMANENTLY. Yea, when I don't need to lose weight anymore, I won't have to be so strict about my calorie intake, but I'll still need to watch what I eat to make sure I'm getting necessary nutrition, and exercise regularly to maintain my weight loss!

3. This is one I still struggle with. I used to turn to food for comfort, to make me feel better. It would for a time, but comfort eating always added guilt on top of whatever upset me in the first place. Right now I am working on turning to the proper source for comfort and encouragement when I feel low or stressed. I'm still working on this one, and I think it is going to be the hardest to overcome.

So there you are! A happy day! I'm about to go enjoy a much needed break during what I would usually use as my workout time.

Weight loss: -2
Current weight: 265lbs

Total weight loss: 40lbs!!!

:-)...and then the refreshments come.

Let there be joy and feasting!

2010-07-07T06:51:00.000-07:00

Life is not all portion control and aerobics!

A couple weeks ago I went to Maine and lost 3 pounds over a week and half. I had a grand time, Here are some pictures from my night out with the gals.

....eating the Blondie brownie at Ruby Tuesday at 10pm! It has about 600+ calories per serving, and worth every single one! This dessert is about as wickedly delicious as you can get.

....fighting over who gets to lick the caramel off the plate...

...and of course trying every single flavor of their fruit lemonade and tea! (100 % non-alcoholic) Hey! It's free refills y'all! I think between the 2 of us, my sister and I tried 6 different flavors.

Is it weird that I always have something in my mouth?

But don't think all our fun revolved around food! We had even more laughs shopping at Wally World!

"All the cool people ride in shopping carts!"

Still the same dorks at 30 as we were at 13! Only now, WE HAVE DIGITAL CAMERAS TO DOCUMENT IT! Mwahahahaha!

Overall I'd say we consumed a good 1500 calories a piece that night, but we laughed most of it off before we got home. Then we laughed the other half off watching movies will the wee hours of the morning.

*sigh....and then the refreshments come...

Weigh in: 7-2-2010

2010-07-02T06:40:00.000-07:00

I'm going to make this short and sweet. My husband has a 4 day weekend! I want to enjoy it to the fullest and get as much family time as I can.

I lost 1 pound this week, but it should have been more. I gained a couple pounds over the weekend, and had to relose it. When I found out that I had lost all that, plus one pound, I was kicking myself. It means I can be losing 2-3 pounds a week, but I have to stick to it and workout/eat healthy over the weekend. I can't be slacking off.

Today is Friday, which is my off day. I'm really sore from my workouts over the past few days, (they've been really intense), so I am looking forward to a day of rest. Day of rest meaning, day working in the yard with my husband, but not an official workout :-P We are also going to Chik-fil-A. They put new one in on our side of town, and we haven't been since we moved out here a couple years ago. I'm going to order the 8 piece chicken nuggets and a side salad, with fat free honey musterd dressing for both. It comes to 400 calories total, so I'm only having tea for breakfast.

Hope you all have a wonderful Fourth of July weekend!

Weight Loss: -1
Current Weight: 267

Total Weight lost: 38 pounds. 17 pounds till we're 1/3 of the way there!

A breakthrough and a Weigh in- 6/25/2010

2010-06-25T06:05:00.000-07:00

I haven't felt much like blogging this week. It's hot and the living room isn't ver1y comfortable to sit in. But I have been thinking a lot about myself and my fears of others, and I actually think I've made some kind of breakthrough!

About a week ago a woman I knew from highschool invited me to be her friend on Facebook. This gal and I were not friends in highschool, I hardly knew her. In fact, I was always a little resentful about how pretty she was. But we went to a small Christian school, so you knew everyone to some extent. She was one of those people who I always got paranoid and uncomfortable around. That's not to her discredit, I was that way around just about everyone.

When I saw her invitation my first thought was, "If she goes to my blog she'll see my weight!" Now, this had crossed my mind about every single person I'd ever known. That's why I had this blog a couple months before I actually posted my weight on it. It's always my first thought when I'm faced with telling people my current weight. "What will they think?" "What will they say?" "Who will they snicker with about it?" "Will they laugh at me and joke about my weight behind my back?" "Will they critisize me and tell me I'll have to starve myself or run to China before I lose that much weight?"

These are thoughts that have always plauged me in the past. They've kept me from working out in front of people, even my own husband, for years. They have kept me from checking my portions when eating in public for fear people would joke about my efforts to lose weight. But almost immediatly following the first thought came a second. I said to myself, "Who cares!!?" And you know what, I DON'T! All the people that love me have been so supportive, that I don't really care who whispers about me behind my back or thinks a negative comment in their mind (something I've always dreaded with a passion).

Don't get me wrong, I still have uncomfortable moments when that old fear and pride keeps trying to come back. But this time, I will not let negative or critical people keep me from achieving what I have set out to do this time. I won't let fear prevent me from doing what I need to do, or talking about it. I realized all this, and accepted her friend invite!

Along with this epiphony came the acceptance that there are other areas of my life where I let fear dominate. One of these is sharing my faith and showing love to other people. I am a Christian, meaning that I am a sinner who has accepted forgiveness for my sin nature from God based on Jesus Christ's death, buriel, and resurrection. I believe the Bible is 100% God's word to mankind, and I seek to adhere to it's teachings in every area of my life. Obviously, I'm not there yet. Fear has dominated my spiritual life as well as my physical, and often prevented me from doing what I knew God wanted me to do. I want to root this fear of others out of my life, not only so I can lose weight and be healthy and active, but also so I can serve God as He wants me to, and share His forgiveness with others.

I've written a LOT more than I planned this morning, but it's all good stuff that needed to be said. However, it will be very hot soon and I still need to run to Walmart this morning. So........

ON TO THE WEIGH IN!

I thought I would lose more because I've been sweating like crazy in this heat! But the heat does make us lethargic. Yesterday it got up to 94 degrees and Baby girl and I were sooooooooooo hot. We have one window AC unit, but it's in the kitchen, so it only cools the kitchen and dining room. None of the bedrooms or the living room have any cooling systems. We have an attic fan that we turn on at night when it cools off, and leave on until the morning just before it starts to warm up. That cools it off at night, but in the afternoon the house is only slightly less hot than outside. I was sweating bullets just doing laundry yesterday!

So despite the sweat, I only lost one pound this week. For personal reasons I did not work out yesterday, or I probably would have been able to say 2 pounds today.

I'm not upset though. A pound is a pound, and the fat is still coming off.

This coming week my goal is to work out every day except Friday (which is today). I'm hoping to get to a pool this afternoon :-P

Weight loss: -1
Current weight: 268

Total weight loss: 37 pounds-- only 18 pounds to go till 1/3 of my goal is met! I'd like to be there by the end of the summer, but we are NOT getting caught up in deadlines!

Making a change

2010-06-22T12:43:00.000-07:00

Some things are changing. One big change is the time I work out. My daughter takes a two hour nap every afternoon. "HELLO?!" you ask. "WHY have you not been working out during this time period all along!?" I can feel you all smacking me on the back of the head. It's no excuse, but that is the time I usually blog, email, facebook....

But I'm making a command decision to cut my computer time and increase my butt moving time! I'm going to start with 45 minutes, and increase time and intensity each week. Netflix is going to help me with this. They have some interesting and even fun workout videos that I'm going to do.

Remember, my weeks go Friday-friday, because that's my weigh in day. My new weekly workout routine is going to look something like this:

This week:
Tuesday: Cardio: 45 minutes
Wednesday: Strength: lower body
Thursday: Cardio 45 minutes
Friday: FREEE DAY!!!!

Next week:
Saturday: Strength -Upper body
Sunday: Cardio--46 minutes on the bike
Monday: Strength--Lower Body
Tuesday: Cardio-- 46 minutes video
Wednesday: Strength--Upper body
Thursday: Cardio--46 minutes video
Friday: FREE DAY!

I was really challanged when visiting my friend to work out more. I am happy to say I DID my full workout today, (although it ended up being about an hour because I kept having to to back and get the moves right.)

Vacation Success and a happy weigh in!

2010-06-18T06:54:00.000-07:00

Vacations are always a challenge when trying to lose or maintain weight. In the past, trips to my home state of Maine usually meant gorging myself on various fattening goodies. Muddy buddies, pizza, deep fried crab Rangoon, and mmmmmmmmmm, my best friends yummy creamy chicken sandwiches! I would always come home bloated, loaded, and 5-10 pounds heavier.

But the friend I used to binge with is one of my greatest weight loss supporters! We stayed with her and her family. It was so different from the past! We ate healthy or low calorie snacks, loaded all our meals with veggies instead of cheese and meat, and worked out or did something active just about every day!

The difference was phenomenal! Instead of gaining 5-10 pounds, I lost THREE!

That's right, this weeks weigh in has me jumping for joy instead of wishing and regretting. I lost 3 pounds on vacation! I learned that I don't have to eat like a pig in order to have fun and enjoy myself! We had a blast, and lost weight at the same time!

For this weight loss, I have to thank my dear friend Kristy. She has been a key factor in the success I have had so far, cheering me on every step of the way. Thank you Kris! You are the best!

Weight loss: -3 pounds
Current Weight: 269 pounds
Total weight loss: 36 pounds

I'm so so sorry!

2010-06-04T21:24:00.000-07:00

Weight gain: +1 pound.
Total weight lost: 32lbs :-(

This post is painful to write. So painful I've put it off until 12:15 am, hoping that maybe it will get lost in the shuffle, and not many of you will read it.

Today's weigh in was horrible. I knew it would happen sooner or later, but I just wasn't ready for it. Perhaps we never are. I gained a pound this week. There was no denying it. I weighed myself at least a dozen times throughout the day, and it was always a weight gain.

This is the first time since I started that I have gained weight. It's hard to describe my feelings and thoughts. As I told my husband earlier, there is no excuse for it. I messed up. I have not been careful, and I have not been working out like I should. Ever since the trip to Florida I don't seem to be able to get back that drive I had before.

A lot of it is the heat. In some ways it's a motivator, because I want to ditch this 150 blubber coat I have to wear year round, but at the same time it makes me very lethargic. It's hard to even think straight when it's so hot and humid, and I've been letting it get to me. But I refuse to blame the heat for my laziness.

I don't know what else to do besides suck it up and keep on down the road. Even as I type that though, that stupid voice in my "I don't like myself" section of my brain keeps telling me I've said all this before, and yet I always end up in this place. It's not a place I like.

Other areas of my life:
Weight is not the only area where I am struggling. I am trying to get to bed early (epic fail right here), so I can get up by 6:30 to have my devotions. I won't use the heat for an excuse, I refuse to do it! I've been staying up too late and sleeping in. I'm still doing my devotions in the morning, but they are more rushed than they should be, and memorization is getting left behind. The house is getting cluttered and in general there is a lack of organization developing that I do not like. It is all my own doing.

Please pray for me while I go through this. It may seem like such a small insignificant thing, but the doldrums are a dangerous place to get stuck in. I don't want to linger here for any length of time.

Rie

Dear Workout Apparati,

2010-06-03T19:34:00.000-07:00

I hate you. You are the bain of my existance. Tonight I came home from dinner with friends, and there you were! You never leave me alone! You stared at me. Stared at me, making me feel guilty. I knew you were right, but I hate you just the same. Every muscle in my body screamed NO NO NO! But you wouldn't let up. You pestered me and pestered me, I couldn't walk away. 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 15-20-25-26! FINISHED! AH-HAHAHAHA!!!!

Now I'm sweaty, faint, and I feel like I'm going to throw up! I hope you're happy. Stupid machine.

Unaffectionatly yours,

Rie

P.S.-----I hate you.

Food log: 6-1-2010

2010-06-01T21:38:00.000-07:00

I know there's no date, I didn't enter it before the website switched to the new day, but this is what I ate on Tuesday. It's not good for a Tuesday, but I didn't go too overboard.

Today was one of those lock my keys in the trunk days. Seriously. It began pretty decent. I got up early and had my devotions before I had to get Mercy up. I'm glad I did, because I don't think I would have made it through the afternoon if I hadn't been prepared.

We ran some errands in the morning. I tried to leave early enough to beat the heat, but by the time we made it home I was sweaty and felt gross! To make a long story very short, I got flustered and rushed and ended up locking my keys in the trunk and had to climb through our porch window to get into the house.

This is not a a fun task for a thin person. For a 270lb woman, it took a while. It involves bypassing a buffet and a barrel, and that's just on the inside. By the time I made it into the house I was covered in cobwebs, sweat, tears, and quite a bit of dust and dirt.

My food cravings kicked in as they always do when my emotions get wound up. I felt the need to be cheered up, and food is my old way of doing that. Thank goodness it was lunch time! Mercy and I watched "Miracle on 42nd street" while we ate, and I listened to some plaintive music after puting her down for a nap.

The rest of the day was uneventful and that's just fine with me :-)

I've already stayed up way to late, and will have problems getting up tomorrow morning, early enough for devos, but I just wanted to say a thank you to all of you for your comments and messages. It is so encouraging to know that there are people there cheering me on.

Y'all know who you are :-)

A disappointing weigh in

2010-05-28T06:09:00.000-07:00

May 21st-28th: Lost 1 pound :-(

I'm sorry, I can't get excited about this right now. I'm semi-glad that it's down a pound, but I weighed myself Wednesday and was already down 2 pounds. Now I'm only down 1? Eating wise, that's absolutely impossible. There's no way I gained a pound since wednesday. *sigh. I hate my body.

All I can say right now is, I want a cheeseburger. With bacon. And onions. And lots of Mayo. And curly fries, smothered in melted Chedder Cheese with ranch dressing on the side.

But I have to settle for Wheat toast, an orange, and a cup of coffee with Splenda. But as I'm feeling really crazy, I may just throw a couple tbls of creamer into my coffee :-P I know, I'm a wild one all right.

A lesson learned, don't hit me too hard Kristy...

2010-05-27T20:08:00.000-07:00

Okay, here's a lesson I learned tonight. I should say, re-learned. I already knew it, but I chose to ignore it when I left the house tonight.

The Story:

We were to meet a friend of my Hubby tonight for dinner. He lives in Cali, and we haven't seen him since before Baby girl was born. We agreed to meet at Red Robin. Not the greatest place for a healthy eater, but still do-able, right? But that's only if you do your research BEFORE YOU GO. I knew their website would have the nutritional info on everything on their menu, but I thought by now I would be able to judge better. Silly, silly, stupid me!

Unsuspecting, unprepared, I walked into the restaurant. The menu was divinity. But I bypassed all those lovely burgers and went straight for the Soup/Salad/Wrap section. I picked a yummy looking wrap that came with Melon Wedges. When it came out I was delighted to see that it wasn't really that humongous (it's totally not as big as it looks in the picture).

I ate my meal, little suspecting what was in store for me when I got home. We came home, I worked out while watching 24, drank about 18 ounces of water, and got ready to look up my nutritional facts for the day. And that's when I discovered....

I had eaten over 2000 thousand calories! The Red Robin meal was 1112 calories alone! I had eaten light all day, but I didn't realize I should have STARVED MYSELF!

The Lesson:

What have I learned? 5 minutes of research is literally worth an hour on the bike! And not to get cocky about how much weight I've lost!

The Stats:

So, here is the terrible truth. However, I am also posting my burn meter, so you can see that eve 2K calories for me is not going to totally prevent my weight loss. It will probably slow it down some though, and throw my chemistry all off because of an overindulgence of carbs and sodium.

See. 3184-2230 = a calorie deficit of 954. (I know, I calculatored it). I'm as honest on the burning as I am on the eating. That's what I burn on a workout day.

Feelin' the Heat!

2010-05-27T13:37:00.000-07:00

I dunno about the rest of you fat people, but I am ROASTING! I hate the heat. I'm trying to reconcile my mind to it because my husband would like to be a missionary in a tropical climate, but I really can't wait to shed this 150 pounds of blubber.

It's like wearing a mink coat when it's 90 degrees out!

Sometimes, my skin will be cool to the touch, and I still feel hot and sweaty! My husband thinks it's great because I'm like a personal heater on cold nights. But when the weather starts to warm up (like it's been doing lately), we're all miserable.

What do you prefer, hot or cold climates? As for me, I'm ready to trade places with the Maine relatives!

Food Log: 5/25/2010

2010-05-25T16:31:00.000-07:00

Two days in a row! I think I'm on a roll :-P

Eating Log: 5-24-2010

2010-05-24T09:58:00.000-07:00

Today is the first normal day I've had in a long time. All Hubby's family is gone, and the house is extremely quiet. Baby girl and I are taking a slow day, just working in the garden, putting laundry away...things like that. There is a sense of calm when you have had a couple busy weeks, and then you find yourself not busy all of a sudden. I'm finally getting to do a few things on the blog that I have been wanting to do. The following is one of them. I have a couple very good friend who are reading this blog and need to be kept updated on what I am eating on a regular basis. So, that's what this is for. I'm going to try and stay consistent with it, but I may miss a day or two every now and then.

My eating this weekend hasn't been great. My husband's ordination was Saturday, so his family took us out for Chinese Saturday night. I was good though, and didn't stuff myself. Just chicken, rice, and one spring roll! YAY! The next day our pastors took my Hubby and all his family out to eat as well, so we had anther big meal. I compensated by eating much lighter throughout the rest of the day.

A week apart...

2010-05-21T05:14:00.000-07:00

My dear friends, it seems like forever since I've written! I can now tell you what I couldn't post about before; I just got back from a vacation to Florida! My sister-in-law turned 40 last weekend, and we all suprised her by showing up unexpectedly. Her parents flew in from Korea, one sister from the Phillipines, and another from Nashville! Hubby and I drove down from NC! We all congregated in the back room of the house she was staying in while she was in the front room vacuuming! hehehehehe! She was so suprised!

Anyway, I couldn't post about it for obvious reasons, she knows about this blog. We had a great trip. Baby girl did fantastic. She barely fussed the whole 10 hour drive.

On the down side,

-I ate terrible and didn't work out one bit. We had carrot cake, coconut cake, chocolate chip cookie, oatmeal cookies, oatmeal cream cookies, potato salad, white rice....the list goes on and on. I even had a Sausage breakfast biscuit one morning!

I was sure that when I got home and weighed myself I would have gained 5 pounds at least. I was dreading it because I hadn't had a weigh in where I gained weight since I started back in January.

On the up side....

-Imagine my surprise then, when I weighed myself yesterday morning and found that I hadn't gained a single ouce! I was exactly the same weight as my last weigh in! WOOHOOO! PARTY TIME! The only thing I can figure, is that I tried to get in a good breakfast, and then I only ate when we got together so while I thought I was overeating, I really wasn't!

Fantastic :-)

Now:
We're back on track. Hubby's family will be here this afternoon, but Baby girl and I are back on our regular healthy eating schedule. I'm about to go get her up now for breakfast. I don't know if I lost anything yesterday, I forgot to weigh myself this morning before I ate. I'm about to go do it, but I'm afraid it won't be very accurate. I'll update this post after I weigh in.

Marie

Confessional: Week One

2010-05-10T11:14:00.000-07:00

The Good: PICS COMING SOON!

On the up side, the shopping trip I spoke of before was a success! I found the outfit I wanted for my husband's ordination (gotta look pretty for all those pictures :-)

I found the jewelry at JC Penny and the outfit at Cato's. A pretty white peasant skirt and a pretty purple top. I didn't really enjoy the trip, because let's face it, shopping is shopping. I'd rather be reading a book or gardening, but having a shopping trip where I found exactly what I wanted was a nice change.

And the icing on the cake? They are both one size down from what I was at the beginning of the year! In fact, everything I got was down a size (except shoes). even my undergarments! This was so exciting. I'm sending you excited vibes so you can feel my joy!

However, Baby Girl and I were both drained when we finally got through with Cato's. She was hungry and overstimulated, and I was ready to drop! I don't know how 3 hours of trying on clothes and walking around stores can wear me out like a 3 mile hike.

The Bad:
This is hard to admit, but I really did bad this weekend. I have to be transparent here, so I'm going to just put it all out there.

Friday: Coming off a 3 day strict eating plan and only losing 1 pound kind of got me down. After the shopping trip Mercy and I came home and I had a craving for Pizza. That's right, yummy, delicious, butt building pizza! So I called Hubby and asked him to pick some up on the way home. He brought home Papa John's thin crust BBQ Chicken and bacon pizza. I had 3 pieces. I refrained from the chips, but to make matters worse I downed 3 glasses of regular Coke. *sigh, STRIKE ONE!

Saturday: As I posted before I knew I wouldn't be eating well on Saturday. We went to a graduation picnic for the graduates in our church. I had half a hotdog, a cheeseburger, potato salad, macaroni salad, and 2 brownies. This time I managed to force myself to take Diet Soda instead of regular. *sigh, STRIKE TWO!

Sunday: Sunday was the kicker! Our church arranged a sit down formal dinner for mother's day. I knew the food would be good, so I prepared myself. I didn't eat anything before lunch and saved up all my calories so I could eat what I wanted. So I didn't feel bad about pigging out for dinner, and it wouldn't have been bad if I had just stopped there!

But it wasn't enough. Around 5 I had an irrational craving for pancakes. I should have just told myself no, but I totally ignored that little voice in the back of my head and made them. But the night got even worse....

Hubby went to bed early, and after I put Baby Girl to bed, I felt snacky. Not the least bit hungry, but snacky! Again, I repressed that nagging voice, and got some wheat crackers, cheese, and french onion dip. I ate a bunch of them before finally setting them aside. *sigh...STRIKE THREE, FOUR, FIVE!

There you have it. My terrible shameful weekend, in all the gory details.

I hate weekends like this past one. They make me feel guilty and fat all over again, despite past success.

The Good Again: So far today I have done really well. I am back on track, and I plan on staying there. Below is my eating plan. For today.

Breakfast: 1 slice wheat, peanut butter, half a grapefruit, cup of tea

Snack: Half a helping of yogurt covered raisens.

Lunch: 1 cup carrots, 1/2 cup plain tuna, 1 wheat wrap, cup of coffee, 1 veggie burger patty.

Snack: 100 calorie chocolate, cup of tea

Dinner: 1 cup of green beans, 3 oz plain chicken,

Snack: 1/2 cup vanilla ice cream and one apple

Do you ever have weekends like this? Lately, I seem to be skrewing up every weekend. I know it's my problem area because I have time before the next weigh in. But I'm tired of having to relose weight I have already lost! Grrrrrr.

Weekly Weigh in and Overview: Week One

2010-05-07T05:21:00.000-07:00

That's EXACTLY how I feel on weigh in days!

How many of you have actually said, "I'm not eating breakfast until I see that scale go down 5 ounces!" I have to be honest and admit I have!

Week of: 4/30-5/7:

Weight Loss: -1pound
Total weight lost = 32 pounds

Eating: So I did that 3 day very strict diet, and I only lost a pound. I have to admit though, that I wasn't as strict as I should have been. On the weekend I slipped big time. I ate way too much Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday so that by the time I got to Tuesday I had probably gained a couple pounds. Therefore, I had to relose the weight I had lost.

Also, I could have been better on the 3 day diet thing. I was very strict the first days. The second day I had one 100calorie piece of chocolate. But yesterday I had a chocolate and we had supper at a friends and I wasn't cautious. I'm not upset about it, I knew when I did it that I probably would pay for it on the scale, and I did. I weighed the conesequences beforehand and I made a decision. I stand by that decision, and I don't regret it at all.

Workouts: I did well this week! Monday I worked in the garden, and Tuesday/Thursday I did an hour on the stationary bike. I am hpoing to get an hour or two gardening in today, but if I don't, I still have to clean the church tonight and tomorrow, which is almost as good a workout as gardening!

The Coming Week:
This coming weekend is Mother's day. In honor of that day, our church is providing a buffet lunch at the local Mariott for everyone in the church! We also have a cookout on Saturday for those in our church who are graduating from college. Now, I don't know about you, but I don't typically diet on Holidays. I'll be really good the day before, and really good the day after, but on special days (especially MY special days), I don't want to think about it. I want to enjoy the special treats.

So this Saturday and Sunday I will not be eating well. AT most I'm going to try and not go overboard and skip smaller meals and snacks, but I'll probably be having some stuff that is not healthy. I will still try to workout on Sunday.

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Afterthought: And wish me luck. I'm going.......shopping today *shudder. Clothes shopping...

Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome

2010-05-06T07:16:00.000-07:00

I have always been a fairly healthy person, apart from my weight. I've never had heart trouble, diabetes, etc. But about 2 years ago I discovered that I have a condition called Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, or PCOS for short. I won't spend much time describing what it is, clicky the link and you should find all you need to know. This is about my struggle and with the condition

Growing up I never wanted to have children. I liked them, and I always thought I might like to adopt, but the whole idea of giving birth scared me witless! But after talking to my best friend, seeing her/my sister/and others go through pregnancy, and after getting married, I began to feel that old baby itch. My hubby and I had agreed not to try for children till we were finished school and out of debt. But as the years went by, we realized that would probably take much longer than we wanted to wait.

In August 2005 we went to Oregon to visit with his entire family. They were all there, brothers-sisters-mom-dad--and of course all the nieces and nephews. And what did I do? I FORGOT MY BIRTH CONTROL! Perhaps it was an intentional mental slip, but it led to a discussion on our desire for children, and we decided to go off birth control.

I graduated in May 2006 and we were still not pregnant, so I began teaching. A year and a half later, we were still not pregnant. I was beginning to feel the pangs only a woman can feel when she desperately wants to get pregnant and for some reason, she cannot. Without really having a reason, I began to feel inadequate. Like there was something wrong with me, and I wasn't good enough. I had dreams about the baby I began to feel I would never have. Adoption seemed an impossible expense.

My imagination even went so far as to fear that God had answered my childhood prayers and I would never have children because I asked for it! Of course I didn't understand God very well, or I would have known He gives us struggles to teach us to trust and rely on Him, not to say, "HA HA! Be careful what you ask for!"

In the midst of all these feelings and emotions, my husband was a rock. He never criticized or put me down. He never blamed me or even implied it was my fault. I am so thankful for that godly man who was always encouraging and loving, even when my crazy emotions got the better of me.

This all came to a head one Sunday morning in December ( I think-some time late 2007). A wonderful couple in our church got up and announced they were pregnant. I knew this wasn't planned, and the husband even said, "This is a surprise. We were doing everything we could NOT to get pregnant." That hit me. I irrationally felt that God was deliberately being cruel. During the following congregational song, I broke down...

I ran downstairs and the cried my eyes out in the bathroom. I hate it when I can't stop crying, especially in public. I don't know how long I cried, but when I pulled myself together and emerged from the ladies room, there was my husband, one of our pastors and his wife. They sat my husband and I down, and he very gently told me my reactions were wrong and I needed to get the issue looked into.

Thank God for godly pastors who will tell us what we need to hear instead of feeding into our stupid imaginations and pitty parties! That was exactly what I needed to hear, and in January I started fertility testing. During these months, everyone was praying. At one point we counted over 60 people that we knew were praying about our situation.

But a month later, they still hadn't found anything and the doctor decided to do laparoscopic surgery to check for Endometriosis. During the months between my ladies room break down and the surgery, God had been working on my heart. I was now able to trust Him, and put the situation in His capable hands. I knew that if He never blessed me with a child, I still had many other rich blessings, and could pour my love and care into the children around me.

The surgery took place in March. They didn't find any Endometriosis, but they did find that I had multiple cysts on my ovaries. I was diagnosed with PCOS. If you read the information above, you will see that infertility and obesity are two symptoms of this condition. I had both! The doctor drained the cysts and told us we probably had a 6 month window before they came back.

A few weeks later, we found out that another couple in our church was pregnant. This time, one of our pastors took us aside beforehand and told us. We were overjoyed for them! There was no resentment or jealousy this time, we were sincerely happy for them and the other couple! God had so changed my heart that I was able to rejoice for another women, even though she was receiving my heart's desire and I was not!

That took place in early April 2008. About 2 weeks later, Jon and I moved to a bigger rental house. We moved on a Saturday. The next morning, Sunday, I woke up early to get food ready to take to church. I had no reason to think that I was pregnant, but I just felt like I might be! To this day I'm not sure what prompted me to do it, but I took a home pregnancy test. It WAS POSITIVE! For a few minutes I just sat there, hardly able to believe what I was seeing. That was my last test, or I would have taken 10 right then and there to be sure!

I went in to the bedroom where Jon was sleeping. I woke him and and showed him the test. He sat in shock for a moment, looking like he didn't understand what I was saying! But this was the first pregnancy test I had taken to come out positive. That morning at church I asked my pastor's wife, a pediatric nurse, about the test and she got excited! She told me they were VERY accurate and in all probability I WAS PREGNANT! The next day I went to my fertility doctor for a blood test, and it was confirmed!

Telling everyone was so much fun! My heart was filled with joy and thanks. God has heard our prayers! When I gave my heart's desire over to Him, He gave it back.

* * *

Now, I am writing this with an adorable little willful 1 year old girl on my lap, snuggling up to me with her blanky. Sometimes it's hard to believe I am a parent, but I am so thankful for this little blessing (even when she's screaming and throwing fits because she's not getting her own way :-P)

We would like to have more children. But there is a great possibility I will need more surgery before I can get pregnant again. PCOS does not go away. If this is the case, we are still discussing whether to go that route again. But even a 10% weight loss can increase the chances of getting pregnant with PCOS! That is a huge incentive for me to lose weight right now. And knowing that I have this condition, helps me understand my eating so much more!

But if God does not bless us with a second child, I am thankful and happy with the one I have, and want to encourage all you ladies out there in the same position to hang in there. Contentment is a hard thing to achieve, but for Christians;

"Delight yourself also in the LORD, And He shall give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD, Trust also in Him, And He shall bring it to pass. He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light, And your justice as the noonday. Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him; Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way, Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass." ~Psalm 37:4-7~

These verses don't tell us that God will give us whatever we want, but that if we trust in Him and commit our lives to Him, His desires will become our desires. Only then can we find contentment in whatever He chooses to send our way. Right now I am just thankful for all the blessings that I have, and not worried about the things I don't.

So far so good...

2010-05-05T13:11:00.000-07:00

This is going to be short and sweet. I won't have another opportunity to blog tonight, so I just wanted to say my 3 day challange is going well so far! I have to give baby girl a bath, get supper ready, and then we have prayer meeting tonight!

Keep up your good work!

Marie

Monday:

2010-05-04T06:36:00.000-07:00

I must confess, I botched Monday. From the moment I woke up, Cinnamon kept trying to jump into my mouth, but I thwarted it at every turn! First it was breakfast. I was so tempted to have Cinn/Sugar toast instead of my usually peanut butter. Then it was the grocery store. Around every turn it was lurking! Cinnamon, sugar, and oooie-gooie-goodness! But I resisted! (It helped that I was with a friend.)

Alas, it got the better of me in the end. When I dropped off my friend, I should have gotten something healthy to munch on the way home. But I wasn't hungry, only snacky! I believed I could make it home without stopping, and get something small and healthy there. But it was not to be. I had one stop. The bank. I had to deposit a check. I pulled up to the ATM, but it was out of order! The bank was closed, and I had to get the check in! The next closest BBT was 10 minutes on the other side of my house. That meant another 30 minutes in the car!

I couldn't take it. I decided to pick up a small coffee from McDonalds, because I needed something to keep me awake. But when I went through the drive-through.....Cinnamon!

Even as I ordered it, I was kicking myself. It was delicious, but I instantly regretted it. Yes, I ate a McDonalds Cinn. Bites and a LARGE coffee. Ironically, out of habit I asked for Splenda in the coffee instead of Sugar. The rest of the day I was lazy, but I didn't really eat too much. I felt so quilty about the McDonalds indescretion that I was super careful, hehehe.

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"HONEY! It's time for bed!!!"

I grew up hearing my dad bellow that statement to my mom almost every night! I remember thinking, "What is she, 5 years old? Can't a woman deside what time she wants to go to bed?" My hubby and I have a very different routine. Most nights he goes to bed around 9/10 and I stay up till midnight or later.

I love staying up late. I get going about 9 o'clock, and for me it's hard to fall asleep that early. However, I do NOT like WORKING late. hehe. I like staying up on the computer, watching a movie, or reading. Late night is my time to relax and veg out from the day.

But yesterday I made a command decision; I have to go to bed earlier. My dilemma is that I usually blog at night after my hubby goes to bed, so I will have to find some other time to do that. (today I am blogging in the morning). But I have to get up earlier, and to do that I have got to get to sleep sooner.

Based on this decision, my goals this week are...

1. to get to bed by 10pm (ick, I shudder at the thought), read for a half hour, and then go to sleep. Last night was my first night, and I accomplished all but the going to sleep part. It took a while for that, but I'm hoping my body will soon adjust.
2. to get UP by 7am: okay, this one I didn't do very well on. I managed to drag my aching body out of bed at 7:30, but I'm going to try and move that up to 6am eventually.

3. Have my daily devotions and prayer time before Mercy gets up.

4. Implement a new eating plan 3 days a week (see post below)

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Allison's 6 Week challange.

Here is the information she asked us to post:

Why I want to participate: I am not a goal oriented person, but I do a LOT better when I am working with someone else. The interaction of encouraging and being encouraged helps me to stay focused.
My contribution: I don't tell you what you want to hear, I try to tell people what they need to hear, but in a loving way. I want what's best for you, and I know that isn't always placating you. For that reason, I'm a good person to have in your corner when you need to hear the truth.
My goals: Go to bed earlier, implement my new eating plan (see my blog), bike 10 miles on the stationary bike 3 times a week ( I have gotten away from this the past couple weeks). I would like to lose at least 12 pounds.

Shopping, bad eating, and what I'm doing about it...

2010-05-01T20:24:00.000-07:00

HATE HATE HATE---ed shopping!
I know we women are supposed to like shopping, but for me shopping has always been a nightmare.

Trying on a hundred outfits and never finding one that fit right....
Gradually getting more and more frustrated with all the cute clothes being too small...
Frustration causing my heart rate to skyrocket until my face is red and blotchy...
getting warmer and warmer until the sweat runs in my eyes and I'm breathing heavier than if I'd stayed home and worked out....
never finding anything attractive because all the retailers seem to think we fat women only want to wear polyester paisley tents or miniskirts...
finally settling for whatever I can get over my head because I'm so hot and sweaty the clothes are sticking to my skin and I can't see clearly!!!!!!!!!!

Yea! Sounds like a GREAT time, right? Is it any wonder that I always hated going shopping for clothes. The mall was about as scintillating as the dentist! In high school I would go with my best friend and her mom twice a year; right before school and right before Christmas. Each time I hoped for better things, but it was always the same. She found tons of cute stuff, and I found out I had grown another size.

This led me to develop the habit of shopping alone. I didn't want to have to come out of the dressing room to show anyone how it looked, BECAUSE IT ALWAYS LOOKED AWFUL! I wanted to be anonymous, slip in and out unnoticed, and most of all....not have to be embarrassed by my size. For the past two years, I've had to buy size 26. It even hurts to type it!

But today, I actually had a really good shopping trip! I've noticed some of my clothes getting to small, and some older smaller stuff starting to fit again. So today I went to Cato's to look for an outfit for my husband's ordination later this month. I had picked up a cute plaid purple sundress for my daughter, and wanted something along the same lines.

To my surprise, I found exactly what I was looking for, and it was a size 26. But the real shocker came when I tried it on...........AND IT WAS TOO BIG! Disappointed as I was that they didn't have my size, I was exhilarated that I didn't have to wear that size anymore! In fact, none of the size 26's fit! It was all too huge!

That's right y'all! I have officially dropped a size, even in my hips! It's still a 22/24 for bottoms and about a 20-22 for tops, but I don't even mind. It's even given me the courage to

Of course, now I have to check out some more Cato's and hopefully find the top I wanted with the pretty skirt I liked. I'll post pictures of the outfit when I finally get it!

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Not Eating Well

The down side for today is that I ate terrible. I mean really terrible. I had pizza for breakfast, a couple brownies right after lunch, and some chocolate for a snack....Add that to the pizza and brownies I had last night, and I felt ill for most of the day. Around 2 I had that "I wanna throw up" feeling. It went away after cleaning the church, but I still feel bloated and sickly. And even still, I have the sugar munchies!

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New Eating Plan
A few days ago I stole a 3 day eating plan from my best friend. I'm going to try it out this coming week. It's basically 3 seriously restricted eating days and then 4 normal, but healthy eating days:

Sunday: Normal-healthy
Monday: Eat normal-healthy
Tuesday: Restricted Day One

Breakfast: Coffee or tea and 1/2 grapefruit and 1 slice of toast w/peanut butter.
Lunch: half cup tuna (plain), 1 slice toast, another cup of tea/coffee
Dinner: 3 oz lean meat, whole cup green beans, whole cup of carrots, 1apple, 1 cup of vanilla ice cream (regular).

Wednesday: Restricted Day Two

Breakfast: coffee/tea and 1 egg, 1/2 a banana, 1 slice of toast
Lunch: 1 cup cottage cheese, 8 saltine crackers
Supper: 2 hotdogs, 1 cup of broccoli, 1/2 cup of carrots, 1/2 banana, 1/2 cup of ice cream.

Thursday: Restricted Day Three:

Breakfast: Coffee/tea, 5 saltines, 1 oz chedder, 1 apple
Lunch: Coffee/tea, 1 boiled egg, 1 slice of toast
Dinner: Cup (plain) tuna, Cup carrots, cup cauliflower, cup cantalope, 1/2 cup vanilla ice cream.

Friday: Normal-healthy
Saturday: Normal-healthy

So that's the plan. If it works well, I'm going to continue it every week. It's still eating healthy, with a lot of veggies and some good carbs and protien. We'll see how it goes!

Weekly Weigh in: 4/30/2010

2010-04-30T06:22:00.000-07:00

These are the weeks that help us keep going. I have mentioned in at least one blog this week that I've been sick, and when I'm sick I tend to go crazy and eat everything in sight! Why? It makes me feel better! So I haven't exactly been good this week. In addition, I didn't work out last night because I couldn't stop if I breathed to heavy.

All those things combined, I really did NOT expect to lose anything this week. The best I was hoping for was to stay the same, but I fully expected to gain a pound or two.

Imagine how suprised I was when I weighed myself and I had...

lost 2 POUNDS!

Has this ever happened to you? All the odds are stacked against you and you still lose weight? For the past several weeks I've been just the opposite! It is exactly these moments that encourage me and help me keep going!

Sitting on cloud nine,

Marie

The hidden monster!

2010-04-29T06:01:00.000-07:00

The other day I picked up a box of Rice Chex at the grocery store. Why Rice Chex? Because WIC approved cereals are VERY limited now, and I'm getting tired of cheereios and shredded wheat. So, this time I got Cheerios and Rice Chex. Very low in sugar, with a whole bunch of vitamins and minerals!
It even has 50% of my daily Iron, (which my daughter and I tend to be low on), in one serving! Fantastic, right?

Well this morning I pull out the box to pour myself a bowl, (heated till it's mush because my throat is still KILLING me), and immediatly my eyes are drawn to the back of the box. In big bold letters across the top of a recipe I see, CHEX MUDDY BUDDIES.

Then I remembered! In highschool my best friend's mom got WIC, and we used to make MUDDY Buddies from the chex mix and peanut butter. They are also called "White Trash" and various other names, but across the land they are well known as one of the most delicious, un-nutricious, mouth-watering easy little chocolate snacks you could ever eat!

My heart started racing...I wanted some muddy buddies! They even had a picture with the recipe on the back of the box, taunting me to make them, make them, make them! Just look at all that chocolate/peanut butter and confectioner sugar! Why on the back of this fairly healthy cereal, do they have to attack us with things we should stay away from?

Has anyone else ever had this problem? What foods make your heart go thumpity-thump, and how do you deal with it!?

Thankfully, I had no chocolate chips in the house, otherwise I don't think even a sore throat could keep me from those evil little chocolates.

SICK!

2010-04-28T10:22:00.000-07:00

Baby girl and I are both sick. We got very little sleep last night, and she's having trouble falling asleep today. Right now I'm debating whether or not to get her up from her nap early because she's not sleeping.

Now, I'm a weird sick person. Most people when they feel sick they don't want to eat. Me? My appetite increases 10x's when I'm sick. I am a comfort eater, so when I'm not feeling well I turn to food for comfort. Even with a sore throat, I feel like eating everything in the house! I'm trying to control it with lots of fluids. Water, honey-lemon water, tea.....

I did work out last night, but I probably shouldn't have. I don't think it helped, but it's so hard to get back in to the habit of working out when you take a day off. Today I'm taking it easy, but baby girl isn't letting me get any sleep.

Right now I'm probably rambling. I don't really know what I'm saying, so I'm going to close this early.

~Marie~

It runs in the family...

2010-04-26T13:18:00.000-07:00

On my father's side, I come from a fat family. (no offense y'all, I love you but we are portly). My mom's family are skinny-minnys, but unfortunatly I didn't get any of her genes.

Here are just a few of the health problems in my very very close relations. All these are from my parents, grandparents, or aunts and uncles:

Conjestive heart failure (very rampent)
Breast cancer: from both sides of my family. I'm very high risk
Ovarian Cancer:
Colon Cancer:
Lung Cancer:
Kidney Failure:
Diabetes: Types 1 and 2
Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome: I have this, along with many others in my family.
High blood pressure
High cholesterol
Knee and hip replacements: I'm speeding toward a knee replacement if I don't lose this weight.

Sunday is a lesson in optimism

2010-04-25T21:58:00.000-07:00

I love Sundays. At the start of the new week, anything is possible. My house is a mess and I need to do laundry and dishes, but I'm hoping this week will go really well. I'm tired of just losing one pound or less, and I'm really going to try for 2-3pounds this week. I think I can do it.

But Sundays have something else special. Not only do we have an entire late afternoon and evening with the whole family home, but I get to take a NAP! I don't know what it is, but Sunday afternoon naps are the best sleep of the week. I don't sleep well at night (writing this at 12:59AM :-P), but Sunday afternoons we come home from church, I put baby girl down for her nap, and then I hit the sack and SLEEP SLEEP SLEEP! Today I slept from about 3:30-6:00! IT was divinity.

Of course, then I got up and had to bike (stationary) 10 miles. I was so relaxed I really didn't want to do it, but my hubby encouraged me and I did. I still haven't been able to do the 10 miles in 60 minutes or less, but we're down to 10 miles in 70 minutes.

Monday morning comes way too soon, so I need to get a shower and get to bed.

Wish me happy hard work!

Just kill my head

2010-04-25T04:47:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was extremely busy, which is good--busy keeps me from eating! Because weekends are so flexible, I like to keep my weekend workout flexible. I help clean the church every week, and when I have the upstairs (sanctuary) I work out on Saturday. Cleaning the sanctuary doesn't take to much effort, and I usually have the energy to do a little something else.

But when I have to clean the downstairs (kitchens, bathrooms, tile floors, nursery...ICK!), I am EXHAUSTED when I get done. So, I work out on Sunday evening. Yesterday, I had the downstairs and it was especially gross. We had our annual missions conferance this week, which meant extra services on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. IN addition we had a pizza fellowship, (I was good! Only 2 small slices and some diet cola), on Wednesday and noone cleaned up the kitchen afterward.

So after scrubbing, mopping, and close contact with various chemicals for 4 hours, my body was zonked and my head pounding. I came right home, ate some lunch, and took a nap. Needless to say, I didn't work out that evening.

Which means I have to bike 10 miles on my cycler friend tonight. I could use some encouragement, because I do not want to do it. I think it's time for a long delayed chat with my weight loss buddy.

~Marie~

Gut-wrenching, heart-stopping disappointment...

2010-04-23T05:45:00.000-07:00

This morning I woke early. So excited, today was the day! I was gonna hit that 30 pound weight loss mark. And then...I didn't. Still sitting at 29. I know it's not the end of the world, or weight loss (which at this point are kind of intertwined), but it's still SOOOOOOOOOOOOO STINKIN' DISAPPOINTING!

***cry.

I've pulled myself back together now. Baby girl is sick and it's raining today, so I don't think I'll get out to work in the garden. I need to vaccum and scrub some floors and bathrooms to make up for it. Thankfully, there is no junk food in the house at the moment. Rainy days are such an inducement to pig out.

Weigh-in

2010-04-22T12:00:00.001-07:00

Fridays are my weigh in days, which makes every Thursday a case study in STRESS! The small meals made smaller...extra long workouts....and of course the long sleepless nights walking around the house trying to burn as many calories as possible before the invevitable showdown with the scale....

You think I exagerate? I'm kicking myself for sitting here at the computer balancing my checkbook!

But all that aside, I truly believe this process is not about numbers. In the past, when I went weeks and weeks without any weight loss I becamse discouraged and quit. But this time around, I have realized that losing weight is more than just decreasing numbers, it's about changing your life for the better, growing more mature spiritually and mentally, being more diciplined, enjoying activity more, being an example others can follow, having a schedule and planning things ahead of time, and building wisdom and strength of character as we shrink and tone our bodies. And success in those areas cannot be measured by the scale.

That doesn't mean I won't eat a lighter supper than normal, or go for 50 walks to the mailbox throughout the day, or garden for an extra hour and a half....

But it does mean that when I get on that scale and I've only lost a pound, or even failed to lose anything, I don't quit and give up. I keep going, because this is me becoming who I'm supposed to be.

"Winning by Losing" --A book review

2010-04-21T21:41:00.000-07:00

January, 8th 2010: This is a post from when I first started losing weight. It explains where I got a lot of my science and eating information:
"I recently met with a friend who is pretty much in the same boat I am as far as weight is concerned. She told me she had lost 16lbs and was still losing! We had both tried various things in the past, but always failed because we gave up. Life happened.
So I wondered what she was doing differently. I know she had a lot of success with weight watchers in the past, but gained a lot back when she stopped counting points. The she told me about this book; "Winning by Losing" by NBC’s Biggest Loser trainer, Jillian Michaels.
A lot of the information in the book is stuff I had heard before, but the bonus is the science section. She explains the science of losing weight better than anyone else I have seen, and gives you formulas for figuring out your personal numbers. How much you should be eating, how much you burn daily, etc.
This book has changed the way I look at losing weight. It is fantastic. I now have a better idea of how many calories I should eat and how many I burn. I learned that I actually burn about 3000 calories per day! I had no idea I was burning that much, but because I work out for an hour and stay on the run, I do! I also learned that to keep my metabolism up I should be eating closer to 2000 calories rather than the 1200 that I was eating before!
She also explains that if you burn about 1000 extra calories per day you should be able to lose about 2lbs a week. Of course there is a LOT more information, but I am just giving you what really hit home for me."